Welcome to "What America Wants," in which we dissect the box office grosses for the weekend and come up with what everyone in this great country is in desperate need of this week.
Madea Goes to Jail
The most recent in Tyler Perry's syrupy line of mischievous grandma films, Madea Goes to Jail, took the number one spot this weekend, with over $41 million in ticket sales. That total is more than twice the film's production budget and double what Perry's first Madea film earned in its opening weekend.
Conclusion: Black women – Madea's audience was 71 percent female and 72 percent black – will spend money on movies, Hollywood just has to stop giving them schlock like He's Just Not That Into You, whose one black character is a waiter. Instead, give them schlock in which a religious black actor dressed as a religious black woman gets sent to prison. Wholesome hilarity ensues!
Taken
This simple little action flick continues to be a sleeper hit, taking in another $11.4 million over the weekend. Its box office gross is now over $95 million.
Conclusion: In a nation where one can't help but feel screwed by so many pricks in DC, New York and Detroit, it sure is fun to watch a pissed-off dude snap necks in the name of vengeance.
Coraline
The beautifully animated fantasy film Coraline jumped up two spots from fifth place last week, with $11 million in box office receipts.
Conclusion: Last week we all but demanded Coraline's ascension, and this week: ascent. Thanks for listening, America.
He's Just Not That Into You
This homophobic, racist chick flick continues to stink up the top five thanks to all the lame saddies who actually believe there's a "war of the sexes." Said saddies plunked down another $8.5 million this weekend to see straight white people discuss how confusing and zany dating is.
Conclusion: Some turds just won't flush.
Slumdog Millionaire
After dropping down to number nine, this relatively old Indian blockbuster – which swept the Academy Awards last night – shot back up to fifth this weekend, probably thanks to people interested in its award potential.
Conclusion: People are depressing sheep who won't take risks until they know that that risk has "Oscar buzz."
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that isnt true that only black women would want to see a movie like that. it would be nice if people would stop catorgizing black people saying they only watch this and they wont watch that. well let me tell you somthing i am a black woman and i happen to like slumdog millionaire. America needs to stop being so stereo-typical and realize that black men and women can like and have just as much as white people.
I completely agree with you Jessica. However, we're talking about Hollywood here!! It's run by white men who know nothing about the rest of the world. Stereotypes is all they know!!
Bravo Jessica.
@jessica:
Jessica, of course but show the facts/digits…..
Come on….were is the proof? I may agree with you in having an open mind as a black person but….
Ha ha ha. Good job MSLEWIS, 'Stereotypes is all they know!!', said in reference to the 'white men' running Hollywood, who apparently 'know nothing about the rest of the world', it really is terrible to stereotype, I hope you can see the irony of your statement.
PS, is it a fact that white men run Hollywood or a lazy presumption?
@jessica: Thank you!
shit, and here I thought the Jews ran hollywood…*
*(PLEASE NOTE SARCASM IN ABOVE POST)
I thought it was interesting that the someone mananaged to film a movie in Baltimore and feature so few Black people too!
(wry smile)
Sorry, I was referring to the He's Just Not That Into You . . .
hehe if you watch "Ernest goes…" movies and you replace him with tyler perry you get the madea movies..now its like every race can have their own ernest. NEAT! (ps asian ernest is jackie chan and ummm i don't really know who Indian ernest would be..i'll have to get back to you on that. perhaps deepak chopra?)