Because where would America be without her Bill of Rights, her diverse ethnic background, her fecund soil, her college football? Senators in our very own nation's capital, whose bloated salaries are paid for with tax money, have decided to take some time off from fixing the world in order to focus on reviewing how college football goes about choosing a national champion. Many people think the current ranking system is unfair, and they've decided that now is a perfect time in history for the government to intervene. Here, a small glimpse into the stupidity of American bureaucracy:

The current system "leaves nearly half of all the teams in college football at a competitive disadvantage when it comes to qualifying for the millions of dollars paid out every year," the Senate Judiciary's subcommittee on antitrust, competition policy and consumer rights said in a statement Wednesday announcing the hearings.

Under the BCS, some conferences get automatic bids to participate in series, while others do not.

Obama and some members of Congress favor a playoff-type system to determine the national champion. The BCS features a championship game between the two top teams in the BCS standings, based on two polls and six computer ratings.

We can all thank creepy polygamy supporter Orrin Hatch for this nonsense. Citizens in Hatch's home state of Utah were apparently "FURIOUS" when Utah was left out of the championship process despite going undefeated all season. This is the mundane shit people worry about when you enact ironfisted booze laws!

Pathetic, weeping football fans, this government's for you: