Damn Tori Spelling and her media smarts! Just as we were wrapping up the week on Friday, she went ahead and had her publicist (or some other "source") announce her breakup with husband of 14 months Charlie Shanian, ensuring (like a Bush administration snafu) fewer people would hear the news.

Their July 2004 wedding – described as "lavish" by 99 perecent everybody and their mother – welcomed 400 guests to daddy Aaron Spelling's Beverly Hills manse, including most of the 90210 crew.

But the romance is over, and now it's our job to find their Renee Zellweger and Kenny Chesney breakup equivalent. And the winner is? Michael Jackson and Lisa Marie Presley, who lasted a full six months longer than Tori and her hanger-on actor-husband.