Shut up, television. Don't use our high gas prices and recent economic woes to sell us your September line-up under the guise of your made-up holiday, National Stay at Home Week. That is really some b.s. right there, especially since ABC, the network that is spear-heading the campaign, starting on Sept. 21, to convince us that everything our parents taught us was wrong, only has two new shows coming out this season. Well, joke's on you, ABC; you might get more publicity with your week-long fakery than your nemesis in April, TV Turnoff Week, but you know that while we're home we are going to be glued to our computers, watching re-runs of 30 Rock on Hulu. And that's how you get hoisted by your own petard.