• Holy obesity, Batman! This dude ate Val Kilmer!

• Mirror, mirror on the wall. Who's the craziest Hollwood mom of all? [Spoiler: It's Dina Lohan.]

• Penelope Cruz and her seemingly identical sister to start their very own clothing line. Which should make it even easier for Janice Min/the rest of the world to tell them apart.

• Kirsten Drunkst: doing what she does best.

• And this, children, is why you should never, ever have liposuction.

• Ashlee Simpson goes 36 hours without drinking which can only mean one thing: Yep, she's dead. Kidding! The correct answer is "she's knocked up and possibly engaged."

[Photo: CelebrityBabylon]