Breaking: Paris Hilton Changes Soundbites

Paris Hilton

In between brushing off questions that require answers which make sense, putting bikinis on her dogs, and talking about why she loves European men ("because they're European"), Paris Hilton just dropped her next huge announcement on Ellen.

She is no longer saying "that's hot." She, like everyone else, is so over it. So she racked her brain for weeks and weeks to come up with a replacement one-liner that will do the job of branding her without forcing her to pronounce anything too difficult. Ladies and gentlemen, without further ado, Paris Hilton's new phrase is:

"That's Sexy."

Immediately erase the passé word "hot" from your vernacular and start stepping it up with the sexy new phrase or you will never be allowed to enter Buddah Bar again.

(Paris also revealed that she doesn't care if we're making fun of her right now, because when you call someone a cunt bitch, it's a form of flattery. We just know somewhere, possibly in California, Denise Richards is forgiving Charlie Sheen.)

May 1, 2006 · posted by · Link · Respond
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  • Comments (0)

    No. 1 Trevor says:

    good story, please check out my blog about Paris

    Posted: May 1, 2006 at 7:28 pm
    No. 2 pamela says:

    I just can't believe that Ms. Hilton is still constantly in the news. I know a lot of women that are prettier (her sister comes to mind). She can't even manage the most menial task…I would be really ashamed if she was my daughter. I guess money can't buy everything. If her family lost all of their money, I really doubt if any of them would survive!

    Posted: May 10, 2006 at 1:33 am
    No. 3 Sedna says:

    Hilarious!!! Loved the sarcasim

    Posted: May 20, 2006 at 1:15 pm
    No. 4 katie says:

    wow i l0ve u!!
    and ur soo not hot!!!lol

    Posted: Mar 21, 2007 at 9:34 am
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