Not feeling particularly motivated today? Join the club! And, while you're at it, distract yourself by reading what a bunch of pissed off pundits have to say. Turns out, they hate bimbos, fat people and Bill O'Reilly. And, as Intern Wendy puts it, "what can you say about a week where Joey Buttafuoco is offering parental advice to troubled teens?" Classic.

• "Jesus, take the wheel and get these bimbos out of the front seat." Michael Musto, recognizing that divine intervention is Lindsay's only hope, Countdown, July 24

• "Point the finger. Don't be afraid. Don't be a wuss. Do it." Joey Buttafuoco, imparting his knowledge of troubled teens to Michael Lohan, Showbiz Tonight, July 25

• "This guy’s Indian name is 'Dances with Facts.'" Dennis Miller, sharing his favorite nickname for Bill O’Reilly, The O’Reilly Factor, July 25

• "…if her parents were any more low-rent, they’d be a spring break destination." Dennis Miller, questioning Dina and Michael Lohan's parental qualifications, The O’Reilly Factor, July 25

• "If you’re going to ban smoking, why not ban fat people in movies and on television?" Tucker Carlson, evidently unconcerned with pissing off Richard Simmons and Perez Hilton, Tucker, July 26