Today's much-needed dose of Cable Quotables serves as a much-needed reminder that most adults are as petty, mean and cliquish as those bitchy popular girls from high school, except without the traffic-stopping good looks, low tolerance and latent promiscuity. Intern Wendy describes today's theme as "Hatred, rejection and losers," which are typically the first three words that come to mind whenever we think about Star Wars conventions.

• "That convention is a loser fest. I mean, there are hookers who have put an embargo on that convention." The suddenly attractive Dennis Miller, proving once again that, in the land of the blind, the man with one eye is king, The O’Reilly Factor, August 2

• "Here’s a guy who wants to take on the Taliban and he can’t even handle Roger Ailes. How sad, how sad." Joe Scarborough, calling John Edwards a sissy, Morning Joe, August 3

• "The only thing worse than that that I could think of would be to make them dress in a Barney suit." John Roberts, on the only thing more shameful than "Hello Kitty," Anderson Cooper 360, August 6

• "Come on, I would bet my house that fat people are, in fact, discriminated against. Of course they are. Everyone looks down on fat people." Tucker Carlson, hating on Santa, Barney and Jay McCarroll, Tucker, August 6