Like codebreakers attempting to find logical patterns out of the random jumble of numbers and symbols, Correspondent Wendy struggles to find a common thread in this week's Cable Quotables. Unfortunately, that's sometimes easier said than done. "This is one of those weeks where it's hard to find a 'theme,'" writes Wendy. "Does the fact that they're all nuts count?" For our purposes? Absolutely.

• "He did everybody a solid and he skipped the party, and went off into the woods to unload a few rounds into Blitzen." Christian Finnegan, explaining why Dick Cheney skipped the White House Christmas party, Countdown, December 5

• “Now I say any guy who lives in the North Pole, where it’s 50 below zero all the time needs a little insulation.” Bill O’Reilly, trying to get Santa to take him off the "Naughty" list, The O’Reilly Factor, December 4

• "She is a lot smarter than she used to be, Keith. She got out of having to work at E!" Joel McHale, explaining why Paris Hilton is an evil, diabolical genius, Countdown, December 4

• "What about Ricky What’s-His-Name? Ricky…what’s his name? Menudo? Ricky who?" Bill O’Reilly, confirming once and for all that Ricky Martin is officially on the D-list, The O’Reilly Factor, December 5

• "If President Bush is going to make a cameo on daytime TV, it‘s going to be in the show he actually watches, like Dora the Explorer. Christian Finnigan, keeping it real, Countdown, December 5