By popular demand, you all are the reason Intern Wendy is now pulling double duty nabbing quotes from our fave cable newscasters (and at time their guests). We offered to double her salary, but as it turns out, she's not only good at poking fun at Tucker Carlson … she's also good at math. So, for your early week pleasure, we present the weekend spew.

• I‘ve had plenty of parties in my life, Bill, believe it or not. I have — I cannot remember having a night where I had amnesia and totally didn‘t remember what I did, particularly on any of my honeymoons. —Geraldo Rivera, The O’Reilly Factor, July 13

• "Do you ever admit you’re wrong?” —Norah O’Donnell, asking the impossible of Ann Coulter, Hardball, July 14

• "Look, it might be a hubcap in a diaper, it might be a pineapple, it might be a troll doll with a price tag attached. It might be anything except a baby.” — Michael Musto, pondering what type of alien Suri Cruise really is, Countdown, July 14

• "I warn you, it's George W. Bush, having lunch with Blair, and there`s graphic eating involved. I mean, the president`s talking with his mouth open. Shame on you, George. Barbara will be talking to you about it.” Glenn Beck, on why bad table manners are worse than saying shit, Glenn Beck, July 17

• I believe it—you said they have the captain on the line, but I don’t know what he’s a captain of. Captain of what? What is he a captain of?” —Miles O’Brien, not knowing if it’s Captain Kangaroo or Captain and Tennille calling, American Morning, July 18