"Aww!"

There's nothing worse than heading back to work after a three-day weekend that went by too fast. Then again, there's nothing better than cute babies. Halle Berry took her daughter, Nahla, to the Los Angeles Zoo and Botanical Gardens over the weekend, and extreme adorableness ensued. I offer these photos to help brighten your day.

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Sep 2, 2008 · posted by david · Link · Respond

Halle Berry is suing the paparazzo who snapped pictures of her four-month-old daughter recently. The photo captions said that mother and daughter were “out and about,” but they were actually in Berry’s garden. Berry is accusing the photog of trespassing on her property in order to get the shots; in California, that’s a criminal offense.

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Jul 28, 2008 · posted by david · Link · Respond

To the dismay of tabloid editors everywhere, Halle Berry chose not to sell her baby pics to the weeklies and is, instead, giving her four-month old daughter away.

She was spotted showing off wallet pics of Nahla to shoppers in L.A. — photogs snapped pictures of the pictures — and TMZ says they're "hearing some paparazzi are pissed, because they wanted the first shot of the kid — a shot that could have gone for millions."

Except, uh, the paps did get the first shots — as recently as Thursday.

Jul 21, 2008 · posted by david · Link · Respond

berry10.jpg Might Halle Berry's baby girl Nahla still be unseen nearly a month after her birth because … Halle doesn't want to sell the pics? That's the word we're hearing from inside Tabloidville. We're told Berry's reps aren't accepting the phone calls of some very interested editors, leading us to believe either: 1) Nahla has some birth defect, which would be sad and depressing, but also less saleable; or 2) We're looking at a rare example of a Hollywood mom who isn't willing to whore out her spawn to pay for the new home theatre.

Apr 10, 2008 · posted by david · Link · 2 Responses
Human Trafficking

halleberry.jpg It's been nearly a month since Halle Berry and Gabriel Aubry birthed Nahla, and nobody's seen the little girl yet. Um … what gives?

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Apr 10, 2008 · posted by david · Link · 27 Responses

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• Rudy probably thought he had it bad when he finished in sixth in the Iowa caucuses, but getting called out for a baseball blunder on River Avenue Blues? Mortifying.

The L Word returns. Countless lesbians pretend the writing is believable, clitoral stimulation is all they need anyway.

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Jan 7, 2008 · posted by rebecca · Link · Respond
Nicole Richie Teases Joel Madden For Dating Hilary Duff, He Retaliates By Interjecting, 'I'm Sorry, Were You Going To Eat That? Haha, Wait! Of Course Not!'

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• Nicole Richie joins everyone over the age of 13 in making fun of Lizzy McGuire.

• As the FBI's case against maybe-rapist David Copperfield grows stronger with every passing day, fellow illusionist Criss Angel is totally on the verge of conceding that his wand-toting rival just might be the Creepiest Magician Of Them All.

• Halle Berry attempts to divert attention away from her "Jewish people have funny noses" gaffe by waving her disconcertingly large boobs in everyone's faces.

• Meanwhile, we keep hearing all this talk about Christina Aguilera's "twins." Come on, people. Is that really any way to refer to a pregnant lady's funbags?

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Oct 25, 2007 · posted by debbie · Link · Respond
Experts Warn: Berry At Risk Of Losing Her Shiksa-Appeal

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Breaking: Halle Berry reportedly made an innocent joke about giant Jew noses on The Tonight Show and then totally tried to cover it up by saying her "Jewish friends" told her it was funny.

Oh, Halle. See, how it works is, you have to actually be Jewish in order to crack anti-semitic jokes with total impunity. Having an imaginary Jewish friend or two (which is to say an accountant/agent) doesn't quite cut the mustard.

Besides, if it's awkward, nebbishy humor you want, go park your tuchas on the couch and watch a marathon of Curb Your Enthusiasm. (Or, for that matter, Woody Allen's Manhattan.)

Either that or take conversion classes, round up a mohel for the unborn son of yours, learn how to burn everything (including toast) that comes out of your kitchen and start working on your "Oy, vey."

Oct 23, 2007 · posted by debbie · Link · 10 Responses
Except Without All The Offscreen Humping

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Reese Witherspoon and Jake Gyllenhaal's new film release, Rendition, was a box office bust, debuting at number 9 on its opening weekend (well behind that Ben Affleck movie you didn't see and that Halle Berry flick you've never heard of) proving once more that strictly for publicity relationships on-set "romances" do not always achieve the widespread success of, say, High School Musical. [Us]

Oct 22, 2007 · posted by debbie · Link · 1 Response
Zahara Is Mad As Hell And She's Not Going To Take It Anymore

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• Baby Zahara gives her parents a hand, officially becomes our favorite Jolie-Pitt.

• Finally, the general public heeds the warning of film critics across the country, consciously avoids seeing The Heartbreak Kid.

• Despite his early retirement, Michael Vick is still leaving football with a legacy. Of course, said "legacy" involves having his name be synonymous with animal cruelty, rather than a Superbowl dynasty.

• Google shatters the hopes/dreams of tech-nerds everywhere by announcing that they have no intention of building a phone.

• Not even Halle Berry can make morning sickness sexy.

• And last but not least, here's an artist's (slightly idealized) rendering of the Spice Girls' very own private jet.

[Image via INF Daily]

Oct 8, 2007 · posted by debbie · Link · Respond

Last week, People magazine appeased its loyal suburban-mom demographic with an uplifting cover story featuring an exuberant (and residually famous) Halle Berry and her just-confirmed pregnancy. Meanwhile, the other celebrity weeklies appeased their bitchy tween/queen demographics by uniformly rejecting the Berry cover in favor of snarky unconfirmed stories about more important celebrities. [WWD]

Sep 11, 2007 · posted by debbie · Link · Respond

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Halle Berry – the actress otherwise known as "that girl who regrets talking about her suicide attempts … again" – is also the perfect launch point for Post-It Mandy Stadtmiller's real life review of Perfect Stranger. The flick stars Berry as a tabloid newspaper reporter (for "The Courier") who, it turns out, has many things in common with a real life newspaper reporter like Mandy!

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Apr 12, 2007 · posted by David Hauslaib, Jossip · Link · Respond

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• The dumb one from The Hills gets breast implants! And no, referring to her surgically enhanced boobs "The Hills" will never stop being hilarious.

• Meanwhile, Paris Hilton's lawyers nix her pre-taped comedy sketch, about "a drunk ditz getting pulled over for a DUI." Prudes!

• Lindsay Lohan makes nice with Hilary Duff. Because she's finally over Aaron Carter. And because it's a "Step 8" thing.

• Barbara Walters is dating an 80 year-old gerontologist. Seriously, how perfect is that?

• Michael Jackson's daughter celebrates her 9th birthday with a shopping spree at FAO Schwarz! While wearing a sinister-looking black mask, of course.

• Halle Berry admits she's an "emotional retard." Which we kinda already knew after she got seriously depressed over David Justice.

Apr 4, 2007 · posted by · Link · Respond

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I was sitting in my car, and I knew the gas was coming, when I had an image of my mother finding me…She sacrificed so much for her children, and to end my life would be an incredibly selfish thing to do. It was all about a relationship. My sense of worth was so low. I had to reprogram myself to see the good in me. Because someone didn’t love me didn’t mean I was unlovable. I promised myself I would never be a coward again.

–Halle Berry speaking out on her struggle with depression in this Sunday's issue of PARADE magazine.

Mar 29, 2007 · posted by · Link · Respond

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• Martha Stewart lashes out at a courtroom artist for painting an unflattering portrait. The artist responded by pointing out "hips don't lie."

• Britney has a new rehab beau! It's kind of perfect, actually.

• Designer Anand Jon didn't plan to physically hurt the woman accusing him of rape. It just sorta happened after he plotted to destroy her emotionally.

• Angelina Jolie has successfully completed the process of purchasing a young Vietnamese boy.

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Mar 15, 2007 · posted by · Link · Respond
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