Concerned about the future of books after all those faux memoirs? Don’t be! NYU students, who are the future of every creative profession, are still scrambling over each other for literary fame.

Or at least they will be, judging by the crowd at last night’s “Agents, Editors and Writers! Oh My!,” a panel discussion on that magical Oz, the land of publishing. We made Intern Anastasia attend.

The talking heads included an agent, a couple of editors, and one “screenwriter” who has, like, two credits on IMDB. Most of what they said was super-obvious, like, “It takes us a long time to get to the slush pile” and “Chick lit is hard to sell right now.”

Finally, someone mentioned the elephant in the room: How had JamesFreyJTLeroyMargaretJones affected what they choose to publish?

Claudia Cross, Sterling Lord Literistic agent and Amy Sedaris impersonator candidate, claimed those faux memoirists hadn’t affected her job much. “It’s hard to sell a memoir to begin with. As an agent, if I see a beautifully-written memoir I think I can sell, I’m not going to do any fact-checking. I would trust the editor’s legal department with that.”

A Random House editor, Stephanie Lane, explained they “usually go through three edits, and each one gets more expensive,” adding, “We won’t publish anything incorrect—that we know of.” The pasty, bearded crowd (note: only the males were bearded) laughed.

Clad in black-framed glasses that all literary types must wear to get their I’m a Literary Type Card, Marion Wrenn, editor of lit mag Painted Bride, pointed out “Tobias Wolff started This Boy’s Life with ‘Memory has its own story to tell,’ which sort of let him off the hook.”

Are you intimidated by Pitchfork? Afraid of its writers judging your taste with words to describe music you’ve never heard of? Relax, loser. Intern Anastasia is here to demystify their reviews.

This week: Fleet Foxes’ “Sun Giant” EP.

Pitchfork says:

Rating: 8.7

The opening track on Fleet Foxes’ debut EP is the perfect introduction to this Seattle band, whose carefully fashioned songs reward more active listening than your typical indie-roots outfit. ‘Sun Giant’ begins with their soft harmonies reverberating in what sounds like a cathedral space. With no accompaniment, their sustained a cappella notes fade slowly, adding gravity to this hymn of contentment: ‘What a life I lead in the summer/ What a life I lead in the spring.’ The only other instrument is Skyler Skjelset’s mandolin, which enters late in the song playing a delicate theme as singer Robin Pecknold hums quietly.

Full Word Count: 699

Anastasia says:

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Ideally in the magazine world, the line between advertising and editorial content is clear. But sometimes, it gets blurry. At such times we are shocked (shocked!), and must share our indignation with you in something we call

by Intern Anastasia.

Seeing Nylon on the newsstand is like meeting this stylish sorta-hipster chick who wants to be your friend. You like The Raveonettes and Gus Van Sant? OMG, she does too. With common interests like that, you guys should totally chill.

But actually reading Nylon reveals that she’s a total poser. She’s friends with sleazy photographers like the Cobrasnake, she puts down your clothes by encouraging you to buy new, more expensive ones and for some reason she keeps asking you to try this new flavor of Bacardi. What are we, in Meatpacking?

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Are you intimidated by Pitchfork? Afraid of its writers judging your taste with words to describe music you’ve never heard of? Relax, loser. Intern Anastasia is here to demystify their reviews.

This week: Atlas Sounds’ “Let the Blind Lead Those Who Can See But Cannot Feel.”

Pitchfork Says:

Rating: 8.6
Bradford Cox spent the summer he was 16 in a children’s hospital having multiple surgeries on his chest and back. His condition, Marfan syndrome, has proven difficult to separate from his music. … Cox plays and sings in Atlanta five-piece Deerhunter, but it’s tempting to say he actually lives as Atlas Sound…Deerhunter’s Cryptograms and Fluorescent Grey EP expertly brought together elements of krautrock, psych, shoegaze, ambient, post-punk, and indie rock, but Atlas Sound’s full-length debut turns inward from that band’s high-volume squall. Cox also trades the four-track of previous Atlas Sound vinyl splits for a laptop. The result is a gauzy bedroom pop album that drifts from ambient bliss-outs to sadsack avant-garage, from hospitals to heartache, as if passing through different stages of sleep on a sunny afternoon.

Full Word Count: 1,041

Anastasia Says:

Whatever disease Cox is suffering from is irrelevant. The music should stand on its own.

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While we were working off our hangover, intern Anastasia was reading the Sunday Times. That girl is ambitious. And she noticed a small coincidence: Namely, that Alex Williams seems to have plagiarized himself.

His article about environmentalism in the suburbs, “Don’t Let the Green Grass Fool You” was eerily similar to a piece he wrote two years ago, “Greening Up With the Joneses.”

They both start with anecdotal leads about regular folks from the suburbs of Washington, D.C. They both detail how suburban life is not so environmentally friendly (have you heard of these “S.U.V.s”?). Then they tell you how those regular old suburbanites are greening it up status symbols like hybrid cars and retro techniques like clotheslines.

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You know the deal. Fashion Week is about more than big names. Intern Anastasia does some investigative work about less well known designers after the jump.

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You know the deal. Fashion Week is about more than big names. And Intern Anastasia does some investigative work about less well known designers after the jump.

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You know the deal. Fashion Week is about more than big names. And Intern Anastasia does some investigative work about less well known designers after the jump. And we already lived our dream of spelling “Anastasia” right the first time.

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After much mentoring, Intern Anastasia is back with more new designers from Fashion Week. By the end of this week, we’re going to be able to spell Anastasia right on the first go. Dream big.

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On Friday, when we introduced The New Hauteness, Intern Anastasia had no fashion experience. After reviewing three lines, the girl is a pro, and we let her loose on some more new designers. Go get ‘em, tiger.

Do you see these mentor skills? Yes, no, we know this post isn’t about us. We’re just saying, we’re encouraging Intern Anastasia because we’re good leaders. Is that such a crime?

More fashion and hauteness after the jump.

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Today is the beginning of Fashion Week. OMG, right?

In the short window of time when you might have any interest in Fashion Week and when you see the phrase “Fashion Week” and you want to die, we had Intern Anastasia introduce us to some new designers and give us her thoughts, which are entirely valid even if she has no fashion experience.

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Ideally in the magazine world, the line between advertising and editorial content is clear. But sometimes, it gets blurry. At such times we are shocked (shocked!), and must share our indignation with you in something we call Product Placement by Intern Anastasia.

What’s that, you haven’t heard of Gotham or L.A. Confidential? Do you fly commercial airlines and clean your own house? Ew. Gotham and L.A. Confidential are two of the lux titles owned by Jason Binn’s Niche Media. Let’s see how much advertiser ass-kissing they have to do to turn a profit, since no one’s paying money to read these things.

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Ever heard people throw around famous directors’ names and think “What if there was a way to make short, pithy references to their cinematic masterpieces without actually having to sit through Battleship Potemkin? Fortunately, now there is! We’ve dispatched Intern Anastasia to brave the subtitles—and the pretentious clerks at Kim’s Video—so you can sound cultured at dinner parties.

Ingmar Bergman’s The Seventh Seal is about a 14th century knight who returns to Sweden after the Crusades only to find it ravaged by the plague. F, right? It’s all about existential angst and questioning God’s existence, topics so weighty only clove-smoking, 15-year-olds with a thing for Joy Division could possibly understand them.

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Ever heard people throw around famous directors’ names and think “What if there was a way to make short, pithy references to their cinematic masterpieces without actually having to sit through “Battleship Potemkin?” Fortunately, now there is! We’ve dispatched Intern Anastasia to brave the subtitles—and the pretentious clerks at Kim’s Video—so you can sound cultured at dinner parties.

Jules and Jim, directed by Francois Truffaut, is considered one of the most important films of the French New Wave. You might have heard of Truffaut—he’s often contrasted with Jean-Luc Godard (not to be confused with Captain Jean-Luc Picard). Anyhow, the big difference? Godard is more cynical, Truffaut is more sentimental.

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Ever heard people throw around famous directors’ names and think “What if there was a way to make short, pithy references to their cinematic masterpieces without actually having to sit through “Battleship Potemkin?” Fortunately, now there is! We’ve dispatched Intern Anastasia to brave the subtitles—and the pretentious clerks at Kim’s Video—so you can sound cultured at dinner parties.

Missed last Saturday’s Lindsay Lohan retrospective at BAM? Console yourself with this guide to Confessions of a Teenage Drama Queen (which was not included in the retrospective, though we can’t imagine why).

Anyways, COATDQ (or Confessions, as I like to call it) opens with an homage to another classic film, Breakfast at Tiffany’s. Lohan, dressed like Holly Golightly, waves goodbye to her mother and then jumps up and down, saying “Yay! I’m free! I can live on my own in New York and do whatever I want!”

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