ELLEgirl (Or is it elleGIRL? Keep forgetting!) is that Hachette Filipacchi tween mag that killed its print version but, in a bout of separation anxiety, insisted on keeping the dot-com alive. It's also the website that's asking you to vote for the next Miley Cyrus, that human Disney brand.

Because it's a PG site, the poll actually asks you to pick among "12 teens who have what it takes to be the next It Girl," including Haley Joel Osment's sister Emily (left), iCarly's Miranda Cosgrove, and Missy Elliot music video breakdancer Alyson Stoner (right, from back then).

But what they're really asking is: Which rising tween starlet is going to be the next to skank it up for a magazine? It's going to be a tough call if you haven't read J-14 lately.

Important magazine people have important things to say about unimportant Miley Cyrus scandal. The New Yorker's David Remnick: "I think it's sanctimonious nonsense." [NYM]

"Hitwise reports today that VanityFair.com traffic spiked by a factor of 20, that searches for the Leibovitz photos doubled the searches for Lindsay Lohan's for-real topless pics in New York Magazine. Hitwise Director of Research Heather Dougherty says 98% of Vanity Fair's traffic was comprised of visitors who had never visited the site before." Just wait till you see the newsstand numbers. [WPN]

And so it has come to this: A spoof of the Miley Cyrus-Vanity Fair photo shoot, starring Annie Liebowitz's nose and dad Billy Ray Cyrus who gives Joe Simpson a run for his creepiness.

Hmmm, maybe we were wrong in our sarcastic declaration that the Miley Cyrus-Vanity Fair scandal is not, in fact, a worthwhile news story. If it were such a tabloid item, how could it be included in this three-party storyline connecting Barack Obama and the Rev. Jeremiah Wright? [SF Chron]

(Click image for larger version)

CONTINUED »

Is the Miley Cyrus-Vanity Fair photo scandal actual news? Some websites – us! – would say OMG YES YES YES and refute any notion that we aren't in the midst of our era's cultural epicenter, DISCUSSING THE MOST PRESSING ISSUE OF THE DECADE.

Then there are actual news outlets like the NBC Nightly News, the broadcast where Brian Williams practices his comedy routine.

On Monday night, he devoted over two minutes to the scandal, which is like 45,000 words in blog terms. Speaking of blogs, one notes, "That would be embarrassing enough for a news organization purporting to be credible." (via) By comparison, Wililams' segment on the Supreme Court's ruling on voter IDs commanded only about 80 seconds.

More embarrassing? That earlier on Monday, Williams also penned a much-noticed Daily Nightly blog post, criticizing the New York Times for, wait, what was it again? Oh, right: Running puff pieces.

But the biggest part of this controversy? That BriWi chronicler Rachel Sklar hasn't yet devoted a lengthy column to the topic on Huffington Post. (Update: Sklar is, apparently, out of this office this week.)

Picking up where Slate left behind in the racy Disney marketing photos – newsworthy thanks to Miley Cyrus! – TMZ.com Googles "Shanghai Zhenxin Garments Co. Ltd.," the Chinese company behind the ads, and puts together a whole gallery of tweens prancing around in naughty lingerie.

Already the Miley Cyrus-Vanity Fair "scandal" has been defused by certain rational arguments, such as, "We see kids younger than Cyrus appear on film wearing fewer clothes and in more sexually compromising situations, and nobody is crying foul there." But nothing helps combat the idea that Cyrus's photo shoot is a non-issue like another still photograph — this one also of a Disney brand.

A Disney underwear brand. In China. That can be described as nothing more than a pedophile pinup.

How did something much more scandalous than a photograph of Cyrus' back get plastered on a billboard? For starters, the age of consent in California might be 18, but in China, where this billboard appeared, it's a mere 14.

CONTINUED »

Rosie O'Donnell: "Leave Miley Cyrus alone," O'Donnell says in a video posted Monday night. "Disney [is] making her apologize. Ay yi yi. [...] Listen, Annie Leibovitz – I had two photo shoots with her. You kind of do what she says. It's intimidating. I also didn't think it was a pornographic photo in any capacity. I thought it was sort of a beautiful portrait. [...] "I like the one of her and her dad, too. I don't know. It's Annie Leibovitz, people."

Bonnie Fuller: "Does anyone else find it ironic that men in a polygamy cult in Texas are being locked up for sexually exploiting teenage girls while here in medialand, a half-nude photo of 15-year-old Miley Cyrus in Vanity Fair is being touted as art?"

Unless you completely avoid entertainment news about white people or live under a rock, you probably heard about tween queen Miley Cyrus’ Vanity Fair scandal.

CONTINUED »

• Miley Cyrus and her parents saw an opportunity to boost her profile with a Vanity Fair photo shoot that portrayed her as more than an innocent little girl.

• Vanity Fair saw an opportunity to sell magazines by shooting America's tween sweetheart as more than an innocent little girl.

They both exploited each other. Neither should apologize. Except for one little thing: that the the photos are, uh, actually quite terrible.

Photographer Annie Leibovitz, responding to criticism over Miley Cyrus' topless Vanity Fair photoshoot: "I'm sorry that my portrait of Miley has been misinterpreted. Miley and I looked at fashion photographs together, and we discussed the picture in that context before we shot it. The photograph is a simple, classic portrait, shot with very little makeup, and I think it is very beautiful.” [Us]

The Today show didn't even get around to mentioning it until its second half hour.

CONTINUED »

Entertainment Tonight was drooling over its weekend scoop that Vanity Fair had pried Miley Cryus' top off for Annie Leibovitz's camera, airing promo spots about the June Vanity Fair that would feature Disney's cash machine in the semi-buff, from behind.

Parents hitting the blogs have called foul; some are labeling the whore affair child porn.

For its part, Miley's corporate parent is blaming Graydon Carter's book: "Unfortunately, as the article suggests, a situation was created to deliberately manipulate a 15-year-old in order to sell magazines," said a Disney spokesperson.

And while Conde Nast fends off the second unwanted scandal – that dares disprove the "all press is good press" mantra – following Vogue's race-baiting Giselse-LeBron cover, the CBS tabloid show also finds itself in familiar surroundings.

CONTINUED »

Posing topless in a magazine known for exploiting attractive females who have Hollywood projects to push is probably not the best way to maintain your $1 billion wholesome image. But Miley Cyrus went ahead and stripped down for Vanity Fair anyhow — and then apologized for exposing her 15-year-old body in seductive poses, almost certainly at the behest of Disney, which has probably branded her in the one place Miley didn't expose to the camera lens.

Not that this is the first time Miley's private side has been shown to the world.