We don't want to admit we're laughing our asses off right now, but we just can't help it. After Andy Pemberton took an EIC position at Spin four months ago, he has managed to go on vacation, make every staffer hate him, and work on a total of one issue.

Rumors of his axing were murmured almost immediately after he started at the job, and "after an agonizing few weeks of tension" between Spin and Andy, the EIC walked away.

That's, uh, pretty much all we know. Andy and Spin aren't really talking, and since we're really not that surprised, we would like to take the next four minutes we were planning to spend on the subject and use it for more laughing.

'Spin' Editor in Chief Andy Pemberton Resigns [Nat Ives, Ad Age]
Earlier: Andy Pemberton's Spin Status? Just another Day at the Beach

As yesterday wrapped, Gawker reported that Spin editor in chief, Andy Pemberton was officially out at the mag.

As WWD predicted this morning, Andy Pemberton has been booted from his brand-new gig as Spin’s EIC … He’d produced only one issue, but, as a tipster points out, said issue “was indeed a giant shitball.” No word on a replacement.

Rumors of his booting began swirling yesterday morning, when WWD suggested that higher ups were not happy with his "first few issues" of Spin. So, where there three issues or only one? (Since Women's Wear did report he's been the EIC since February, we're going to guess he probably worked on more than one issue, but only fully produced one?)

Now that we have none of that cleared up, let's move on to what Pemberton has to say about his departure from Spin.

Oh, he says he's not actually leaving Spin, he was just going to the beach. Now we get it. The rest of this mixed up mag gossip, in which the only question we answer is "how big of a shitball is Pembo?" … after the jump.

CONTINUED »

• If the late, great Barry Bingham Jr. hadn't sold his newspaper 20 years ago, we would have a paper with ethical standards and commitment to the public. Instead, we're stuck with the Post and their pay for protection stories. [BG]

• Dateline is slammed for playing Ali G and bringing Muslim men to a NASCAR race. Don't look at us, we think it's hilarious … and of course socially relevant. [USAT]

• Sheryl Gay Stolberg, the New York Times' newest White House beat writer, puts on her most earnest "I'm super excited for this new job!" face. [Media Mob]

• Meet Spin's newest hire: punk porn star Joanna Angel. So nice to see people like her and Jessica Klein finding new outlets for their creativity. [Fishbowl NY]

• David Pogue says he will accept no freebies. None whatsoever. Unless of course the Times foots the bill. [Media Orchard]

• How Spin — the mag's editors are quitting via e-mail now? [Fishbowl]

• We love when Simon Dumenco says "duh." Especially when it refers to the over-exaggerated "death of newspaper." [Ad Age]

• James Wolcott knows a good cat fight when he sees one. And like a good media member, he'll pay a little more money when that brawl involves two conservatives. [VF]

• Even though Audacia Ray, the editor of $pread magazine "is no sleeping beauty," when she's not blogging, reviewing porn, or pole dancing on the subway, she sleeps. Blogging in fuck me boots is pretty exhausting. [Gothamist]

• Just like journalists, not all bloggers are good writers. Wow, these people just discover something new about this crazy sphere every day. [WSJ]

• Nothing says "crack baby" like a Whitney Houston pregnancy rumor. [Scoop]

• Graydon Carter might put Paris Hilton the cover of Vanity Fair, but that doesn't mean her parents are welcome at his Oscar party. [Page Six]

• When Lindsay Lohan, the Olsens, and Paris Hilton get together for Amy Sacco, you'd expect such tension to be accompanied by a Nicole Richie arrival. [R&M]

• Rapper Shyne is changing his name to something Jewish and will take out a New York Post ad to announce it. Page Six, naturally, must cover it. [Page Six]

• Kid Rock blames Scott Stapp for losing their sex tape. And then thanks him for the PR, given his upcoming album. [AP]

• Dennis Rodman parties with the gays at Splash. Gays, everywhere, yawn. [Page Six]

• NBC White House correspondente David Gregory wasn't drunk yesterday when he phoned in to Don Imus' show. He had the giggles. [R&M]

• What's a Spin magazine celebration if there isn't a simultaneous Spin snub? [Page Six]

• Spin writers have already begun to twirl off into the sunset, with Chuck Klosterman leading the pack. [Fishbowl]

• George Pataki is going to be A-OK — just as soon as he can poop, scarf down some pizza, and kick back a few brewskis. [NY1]

• This weekend’s New York Times magazine will be devoting 200 pages to the heavenly topic of real estate. Yes, Lockhart Steele is going to be in the bathroom for a while. [NYO]

• We don’t think Americans are brilliant or anything, but they know who Wilmer Valderrama is, and they definitely know that neither we nor Jon Stewart are journalists. [DFW]

• All the girls at Michelle Williams' old elementary school scratched “Michelle is a bloody cunt” on the bathroom walls. Ok, they didn’t, but the homophobic principals who are secretly jealous of her Heath kiss have totally disowned her. [Sign on San Diego]

• How cute! Mariah Carey is wearing one of Cam'ron's crew, The Diplomats's chains. It's like the bling version of getting pinned. [R&M]

• Devastation comes to hipsterdom as the Test Icicles break up. Before even doing anything at all. So much for the next over-hyped flash in the pan band. [NME]

• Going once, going twice … and Spin is sold! To the highest/only bidder. [Folio]

• The Killers' former manager is suing the band for $16 million, which covers like, a month's supply eyeliner. [Fox News]

• Madonna was "shocked" and "devastated" by the attack on her children's book illustrator, Jeffrey Fulvimari. Not devastated enough to visit him, mind you, just enough to publicly declare it. [Lowdown]

• If Oprah brings home a C on her report card, poor FHM probably doesn't stand a chance. [Ad Age]

• The Washington Post gives their comments right back. [Romenesko]

• Bill Maher waxes on his three month drinking bender and the sale of Mexico. [HuffPo]

• Spin is on sale. Get it now, and save $37 million off the original price. [Folio]

• Who knew the media world could get so exciting in Illinois? We didn't even know those U of I kids stayed sober long enough to put together a newspaper. [Fishbowl, NY]

• Teenagers are taking over the world. You know, in case the end of the world due to melting glaciers wasn't "realistic grounds" enough to induce your next panic attack. [Business Week]

• You may be able to catch her lunching at Michaels, but today is your last chance for Rachel Sklar's Canadianist take on the incestuous world of New York media. [Fishbowl, NY]

• No way, that little James Frey story increased traffic to The Smoking Gun? We would have never guessed that in a million little obvious years. [Media Week]

• Spin it right round baby — the little music mag that is still trying to say it could may be getting a home. [WWD]

• Don’t worry New York Times, nobody really expects you to understand the ancient Chinese art of getting names right. [NYO]

• While we were out avoiding the reality that George W. Bush is still our president, some of the real journalists were actually paying attention. [Slate]