“We usually don’t comment on stuff like this. But you should know sources are liars. If you guys want to do the right thing, you won’t post that item. It’s all BS.” That was the response from Ben Affleck’s camp when E! gossip Ted Casablanca ran past them rumors he was on the way to splitting with wife Jennifer Garner. The only reason we know? Because he posted the item.

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Is news of Ben Widdicombe’s departure about to get trumped – in gay gossip circles – by Ted Casablanca? The E! gay-ssip today mentions his upcoming nuptials: “You’re pissy; we’re less so (I’m getting married in less than a week, and Becky’s gonna be free of my pushy ass for a whole two, woo-friggin’-hoo!).” Um, congrats?

Partner Jon Powell proposed to Casablanca last June “on a deserted Hawaiian beach.” At their wedding, they’ll still be wearing Speedos, but with tuxes over ‘em.

From Page Six, Jan. 8:

WHICH Tinseltown sex siren with a humanitarian streak has resumed her old habit of dabbling with heroin? She paid a recent visit to an old rock star friend and joined him in narcotic stupor . .

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• Ted Casablanca reveals the secret behind Angelina’s rapid weight loss. You guessed it: Black tar heroin.

• Kate Moss tells Pete Doherty that she’ll only marry him if he can lay off the crack-pipe. Doherty responds to this ultimatum by writing, “Smack and needle-free we shall marry in the summer and I become 10 times happier than any given smackhead. Huzzah!” Yeah, good luck with that whole marriage thing, Kate.

• Paris Hilton is sick, tired of being used by the media without whom she would be nothing.

• Hotelier Andre Balaz to give the Chelsea Hotel the “Chateau Marmont” treatment. Plans include completely renovating the interior, and stocking the Star Lounge with Moet champagne, trendy ottomans and the Olsen twins.

• Meanwhile, Chad Michael Murray isn’t just a mediocre actor who enjoys marrying barely legal teenagers and then promptly cheating on them. He’s also a nightmare ex!

• Kim Kardashian is looking for love the only way she knows how: by hanging with Britney Gastineau, and then begging people to introduce her to Pharrell Williams before settling for Fabolous instead.

• Rapper 50 Cent is into having into having sex, he ain’t into making love. But apparently, he is into holding hands with the middle-aged Dutchess of York.

• Christina Aguilera, now a married woman, is renaming herself Maria Bratman. She just didn’t like the ring to “Xtina Bratman.” [The Sun]

• NBC is hoping to reclaim Thursday nights by repositioning My Name Is Earl from Tuesdays to the network’s prime night, as expected. What does that mean for Joey and The Apprentice? They’re being ostracized to as-yet-unchosen (and much less favorable) slots. [AdAge]

• Even testimonials from Jamie Foxx and Snoop Dogg won’t save Stanley Tookie Williams from death row. [LAT]

• President Bush will likely escape jury duty in McLennan County, where his Crawford ranch is located. Something about being preoccupied with running the country. [AP]

• All Paris Hilton wants for Christmas: a convertible red Ferrari 430. Oh, and if you could get rid of her V.D., that’s be super duper too. [The Insider]

• E! gossipist Ted Casablanca isn’t a huge fan of Brokeback Mountain — and the gays, one again, feel betrayed. [The Awful Truth]

• Remember folks, tonight David Letterman welcomes Oprah to the show. Or, more accurately, Oprah begrudgingly agrees to be on the show to promote The Color Purple.