Tourists, Broadway crowds, horse drawn carriages, Conde Nast. Do you really need another reason to avoid Midtown? The city would like to give you one just as soon as they get around to building a boat ramp at Pier 78.

Only then will they be able to support ducks, those amphibious tour buses so popular in London and Philadelphia. It won't be long before these half-car half-boat monstrosities are crusing the center of our fair city, then dashing off into the Hudson River.

But some, like us, aren't so amused by the idea.

"Right from the get-go, the concern the board had was yet more traffic in an area we feel has got way too much traffic already," Mr. Doswell said. As for being invaded by ducks, he said, "It all sounds a little strange, but I guess they figure people will pay money for this experience."

Indeed, people probably will. Each year, more than one million of them ride the vehicles, encouraged by guides to quack like ducks or blow kazoos as they bounce and bob along.

And you thought the tranny hookers on St. Marks were bad.

Make Way for Ducks, in Manhattan? [New York Times]