The Federal Communications Commission doesn't have much to do now that the whole Janet Jackson Nipplegate fiasco has finally, mercifully been settled. And not in their favor.

Sure, Kevin Martin & Co. can watch the morning shows and hope Jane Fonda says the C-word again, but in the meantime the FCC plans to 'round up a posse and mosey from town to town to spread the word about televisions making the switch to entirely digital broadcasting.

Which seems, um, totally archaic as a method for getting people to switch out of their analog technology. Though perhaps the Internet isn't the most effective means of reaching people who still have bunny ears sprouting from their TV sets?

As smart folks like you, with your cable boxes and satellite dishes, know, on Feb. 17th you'll no longer be able to watch House or America's Got Talent using over-the-air signals, or "tv waves," as moms are fond of calling it. The fix is a digital-to-analog converter box. Don't worry, grandma, they're subsidized by the government, but the FCC still needs to congregate all the unawares before the TV blackout brings back the PTSD of Orsen Welles' War of the Worlds.

Hence, the FCC's town hall meetings in cities that have been identified in having "more than 100,000 households or at least 15% of the households relying solely on over-the-air signals for television." Why the government thinks we need these bass-ackwards steps to inform the public, instead of oh, say, a PSA on local news channels, might never be revealed. Don't worry though, the chances that this will effect your life are slim; television doesn't believe young people are even watching it anymore, so why would you care?

Just remember to tell Gramps about the switch. Maybe send him a text?