(Click image for larger version)
Rupert Murdoch's attack on AMI and Wenner Media may not "officially" begin until tomorrow, but why hold off for Thursday's debut of Page Six The Magazine (P6TM) when you can have it today? We've scored an advance copy of the 74-page glossy and, in between all the Michael Kors fragrance ads and American Express still trying to convince us its "IN:NYC" card is hip, we managed to find all the shiny content.
The front of the book's "Gossip Extra!" is simply an expanded version of the daily Page Six column: same look, same feel, same blind items that may or may not be held over from last season's Fashion Week. Names dropped: Ed Koch, Paris Hilton, Michael Jackson, Mark David Chapman, and Dita Von Teese.
The Angelina Jolie cover story splashes pics of her at age 13 looking, well, not so sultry. Scribe Steve Garbarino offers us the vixen's childhood tale that you'd never find in OK!. Scathing, we know.
Next up is the "Oscar Special," which was likely slapped together several months ago, then updated with photos and boldfaced names of the stars that ended up receiving nominations. Blame the Post's Kyle Smith for the third-grade one-liners filling the copy. But flip through a couple pages of this section and you'll get New York Observer mascot Simon Doonan revealing shocking revelations like "we've become overly focused on movie stars." So let's write about 'em some more!
Moving on, we arrive at "A Shore Thing," P6TM's attempt at a photo shoot with Victoria's Secret models Gisele Bundchen and Alessandra Ambrosio, as well as newcomer Izabel Goulart. You'll find the same exposed-breasts-but-not-really that Jennifer Aniston offered up so eagerly on GQ.
"Hot Wheels" comes next, showing stars and their whips, which as we all know is just filler to attract Detroit's ad dollars. If Out can do it, so can P6TM.
"Style File" interviews Heidi Klum with headlines so heavily dotted with exclamation points we almost forgot Joe Dolce wasn't behind this title. But Heidi, god bless her, isn't afraid to throw around some dirty words. P6TM, however, is still keen on being part of the Post's "family paper" image and won't print them in full: "It always rains during Fashion Week. There is always shi-- weather in New York." You connect the hyphens.
The Hilton clan are sized up next to the Hearst socialiting crew (Amanda and Lydia) in "Social Studies," with subject matter even more mundane in this course than Western Civilization. We get it: Both Paris and Lydia have dated losers. No Venn Diagram needed. (Though we do love the Vogue vs. French Vogue faceoff, with Anna Wintour's daughter Bee Shaffer and Carine Roitfeld's offspring Julia grabbing mentions.)
Since we're quite ready to actually ditch this glossy and pick up a book at this point, it's only natural that the uppish Accompanied Library Society feature shows up. In sum: Rich kids think drinking Moet is even classier when surrounded by books.
Flip, flip, flip, and we get a hotsheet of the hot eateries (Four Seasons! Nobu 57! Michael's! Cipriani!) you already knew about; a fashion accessories spread to rationalize not returning those Louis Vuitton earrings; Amy Sacco pouring dirnks; Stephen Starr's Manhattan restaurant takeover; Keith McNally vs. Graydon Carter in a half-page item aptly titled "Food Fight" about their upcoming foodie endeavors; a roundup of posh nightclubs opening this spring (G-Spa at Gansevoort, Pink Elephant at Crobar); photos of stars making movies in town; Page Six nearly taking credit for nicknaming Owen Wilson "Butterscotch Stallion"; Richard Johnson explaining why it's fun to feud (and why you shouldn't mess with the Sixers); gratuitous shots of stars at the beach (including Ricky Martin and his "trainer"); cartoons of P6 targets; and A.J. Daluerio opining on Scores and their celeb clientele.
Whew. And the back page? Photos – a la Us Weekly – of stars reading the New York Post, from Lindsay Lohan and Janice Dickinson to Sophie Dahl and Kate Moss. We love a good narcissist.
If we've spoiled tomorrow's surprise, we apologize. But at least we saved the best part for publication: Richard Johnson's editor's letter where he gives his bosses a lapdance that Jon Friedman would be proud of.
Oh, who are we kidding? We've printed it in full, after the jump.
You are holding in your hands the culmination of 30 years of blood, sweat and tears — and plenty of threatened lawsuits.
When Page Six launched in 1976 – the first column ever to meld gossip with hard-nosed reporting – no one could have foreseen it would become the preeminent brand in gossip, a household word often mentioned in movies and books.
There have been seven editors over the years, and dozens of reporters, and I've been blessed to have worked with most of them during the 20 years I've edited the column.
But Page Six would never have become a phenomenon if it weren't part of a phenomenal newspapers, the New York Post, which has grown steadily in stature and circulation to become to table-setter for public discourse in this city.
We're very proud of this latest step forward. So sit back and enjoy Page Six, The Magazine.