SELF was one of the mags that got all involved in the hype over Heather Graham's new show that really couldn't. So involved, in fact, they planned on putting the former Roller Girl on their April cover.

But then Emily's Reasons Why Not was cancelled after one freakin' episode, and not even the backdoor into 4 Times Square wanted her.

When Graham's much-hyped show bombed for ABC, Self Editor Lucy Danziger was in a momentary panic. On short notice she was able to snag "American Idol" Carrie Underwood, who agreed to fly from Nashville to New York for a photo shoot on Tuesday.

"We sent Heather flowers and told her we'd put her on the cover when she was involved in another project," Danziger said. "She totally understood."

Flowers: Conde Nast's way of saying, "sorry, but you're career totally tanked, and we no longer have any use for you." Which is actually surprisingly similar to Katie Couric's reaction to Sasha Coen on the Today Show this morning.

QUICK SELF SACRIFICE [Keith J. Kelly, NYP]