• With one simple, heartfelt gesture, Jason Davis singlehandedly restores oil family's good name.

• If you've never perused the creepy gay personals, then brother, you haven't lived.

• Pete Wentz defends girlfriend Ashlee Simpson's honor by smashing a bottle over some dude's head. Sorry ladies, this one's taken!

• Liev Schrieber ignores the implicit "No Smoking" sign hanging over his wife Naomi Watts' pregnant belly.

• It turns out that black women sometimes get abducted, too. It's just that nobody bothers reporting it.