• It's much easier for celebs to sue non-US publications. Hence, Bonnie Fuller's natural migration to the States. [WWD]

• Jessica Simpson fires her agent for not explaining to her that "brownhead" is not a word. And for not loving her boobs as much as her daddy does. [Us]

• This is the gayest Clay Aiken press release we've ever seen. Even the gays think it's gay. [Queerty]

• We say goodbye to City Slickers star Bruno Kirby. We're sure we made out with someone at some point while that movie was playing in the background. Thanks, dude. [TMZ]

• Uhh, Sandra Bernhard is scaring the living shit out of everyone. Everyone. [MAC]

• Lindsay Lohan loves Sex and the City so much, she’ll sleep with every man possible just to have Charlotte’s experience with crabs. Maybe even a horny blogger who doesn't care about STDs? Not us, not us! [Hollywood Tuna]