• Jessica's new look bears an uncanny resemblance to American Idol's resident drunk.

• Its time to decide once and for all, which Hollywood fatty has the biggest man-boobs.

• Cause of death still unknown for Anna Nicole, but now Zsa Zsa Gabor's ex-husband is claiming he might be Dannielynn's biological dad.

• Students are starting to use "im lingo" in their essays; And u thought kidz were getting smRtr…

• Finally, Queerty responds to those gays who care way too much about being Genre's MOTY.

• Eddie Murphy is back to making crappy, unfunny flicks. It's as though he's trying to show everyone Dreamgirls was just a fluke.

• HX Media attempts to cut costs by continuing to fire the majority of its staff.