• Kate Moss' friends sing "Happy Birthday" to her in the lavatory, where she spent the majority of her bday "powdering her nose."

• Nick Lachey and Vanessa Minillo to stop living in sin??

• Today, Widdicombe has us racking our brains to figure out which "travel magazine expert on a popular daytime TV show" has been pulling a Paula Abdul, a.k.a. boozing it up at the press junkets.

• Dedicated actress Sienna Miller became a super-skinny boozehound…all in the name of nailing a role, of course.

• Bonnie Fuller to "inspire" Hunter College grads today while Janice Min hopes to corrupt upstanding Ivy League writers/editors over at the Columbia Specator.

• The Daily News promised Paris Hilton would perform at the Plumm; Page Six can't wait to gloat after Paris is a no-show.