• Angelina Jolie is under fire for denouncing Madonna for child-stealing when she herself is "well on her way" to kidnapping an entire starting five.

• Sharon Osbourne used to retaliate against negative reports in the press by sending the offending journalists "poo" in a box.

• Publisher Leigh Haber is already being toted as the next Judith Regan. A delighted Haber is to have begun practicing her racial and ethnic slurs.

• Christian Slater and Sharon Stone continue to dry-hump each other without actually dating.

• Apparently Mandy Moore gave DJ A.M. her digits right in front of ex Wilmer Valderrama's face. Fortunately, Valderrama has a never-ending supply of up and coming tween starlets to help dull the pain.

• Dustin "Screech" Diamond is reportedly "very nervous" about rumors that Paris Hilton's bestie, hottie Kim Kardashian, is shopping around a sex tape of her own.