• After three whole hours of sipping wine, Cameron Diaz dished that her new surfer boyfriend has a penis like 9-inch long breadstick!

• Meanwhile, Justin Timberlake to show off his own manhood by performing "Dick in a Box" (with SNL's Andy Sambrrg) at Madison Square Garden.

• Isaac Cohen has supposedly dumped Britney Spears while simultaneously pet sitting for her annoying yappy dog.

• Mischa Barton reportedly dumped Cisco Adler because of his naked, NSFW pic that hit the internet amdist Paris Hilton's giant bag o' crap. Also, because of his "creepy beard."

• Posh and Becks go on vacay, giving Victoria a "much-needed" break from her busy schedule of designing clothes for full-figured women and eating only 300 calories a day.

• The media rep for the Wonderland Center also reps NY Post octogenarian gossip, Liz Smith! Upcoming: Lindsay Lohan to "flip out," Cindy Adams to write incessantly about her Yorkies and Liz Smith to dine with some "really, really old people" at Elaine's.

• Heidi Montag (from that MTV show, The Hills) hopes to inspire underage teenage girls across the country by stripping down for a sleazy, Stuff mag photo-spread.