• Gwyneth Paltrow's baby Mortimer hasn't even been born yet … but now's as good a time as any for the future celebrity to start his underage drinking [NYDN]

• Pete Doherty must be sucking up some of Kate Moss' intelligence. [Page Six]

• After a long struggle over which celeb religion outfits were hotter, the Beckhams have finally chosen Kabbalah for their fake faith. [The Scoop]

• John Kerry may hate tomatoes, but Julia Roberts finds them totally hilarious. [AP]

• We're surprised that Oprah doesn't want to host the Tony Awards. She's normally so excited by those Nate Berkus/Isaac Mizrahi types. [AP]