• Newlyweds skyrocketed Jessica Simpson from C-list to B-list, while Nick Lachey somehow stuck around on the D-list. No worries though, they didn't have a prenup — which means Nick's gonna get a hefty chunk of Simpson's purse. [PerezHilton]

• Speaking of Nick, he's retained publicionado Ken Sunshine to battle Jessica's supra-publicist Rob Shuter in the gossip columns. [Lowdown]

• More Lachey news? Even we are starting to get ill. He's in talks with The WB to star in his own sitcom, where he plays a famous baseball player in a new marriage. How eerily familiar .. we already know how the mid-season cancellation is going to turn out. [Reuters]

• First Jamie Foxx thinks he's the real Ray Charles. Now Lenny Kravitz is about to take on Jimi Hendrix's likeness. [Fox 411]

• In Paris Hilton's world, it's all about leftovers. While she's parading around with Mary-Kate Olsen's ex Stavros Niarchos, her ex-fiance Paris Latsis is new pals with Tara Reid. But it's just platonic, for all our sakes. [Page Six]

• Laguna Beach's Kristin Cavallari is extending her 15 minutes, thanks to co-hosting duties for UPN's new reality show Get This Party Started. Alongside Extra's Ethan Erickson, the career reality TV starlet will repent for her on-screen sins by throwing parties for those in need. [NYDN]

• Michael Jackson still hates the Jews. Now he hates the Italians. But he loves the Muslims. [Page Six & R&M]

• That sound you hear is A-list actresses wailing in agony, because Dolce and Gabbana decided not to design for the Oscars anymore, claiming it's "too conservative." [Extra]