• We don't know if this is a "I got punched in the face by Lindsay Lohan," black eye, or a "my teeny tiny nose job gave me this bruise" black eye, or not a black eye at all. Weak. [TMZ]

• Should we just leave the entire Daily News gossip to Wonkette and Huffington Post today? C'mon, it's Friday! We want strippers and sex tapes, damn it. [NYDN]

• Did Brad Pitt tell Jennifer Aniston about the baby? Did she cry and pull out her hair and pull bongs with her new boyfriend? There's just so much to consider in times like these. [People]

• Alls he has to do is slap an author's note on that fake story, and James Frey's sales, readers … hopefully everything, will remain high. [MSNBC]

• Will a divorce put David Hasselhoff back in the news? Worked for Nick Lachey. [MSNBC]