• Band-aid heriess Casey Johnson was "devastated" to find out she couldn't adopt the 2 1/2 year-old child she'd bonded with for three (whole!) weeks. Luckily, there are other fish in the sea!

• Turns out disgraced Tyco chief Dennis Kozlowski is one funny jailbird!

• A Mayan women criticizes Apocalypto for its historical inaccuraces; Gibson fires back by pleasantly suggesting that she "fuck off."

• Janice Dickinson returns to what she does bust: crazy, incoherent rants.

• When Kirk Douglas walks into a room, you'd better start clapping.

• Gwen Stefani to guest-mentor on American Idol; Sanjaya to immediately stake his claim on "I'm Just A Girl."

• What really caused Anna Nicole Smith's death? The tabloids say they've got the scoop forensic experts can only dream about!