While Lance Armstrong and Matthew McConaughey have shot down rumors of a homo love affair in this month's Details – because if there's anywhere to deny being gay, it's certainly Daniel Peres' pages – a keen eye (that is, a queer eye) notes they left out the possibility of a Jake Gyllenhaal romance. "We tried it. Wasn't for us," McConaughey tells the mag. While that may be true, let's be sure the count off the things that are for McConaughey: Never wearing a shirt in public; running, yoga, and other means of exercise nearly daily, in public, also while shirtless; wearing clingy boardshorts while "surfing," certain to display amble bubble butt and crotch outline. The only way to be certain Matthew isn't plugging Lance? White boy can't dance.