• The upfronts are here, the upfronts are here! ABC and CBS pick up dramas, NBC hopes to attract Dungeons & Dragons crowd by focusing on Sci-Fi and fantasy.

• Meanwhile, The Apprentice is "missing" from the new fall lineup. (Alternate phrasing: NBC to The Donald: You're fired.)

• Scientologists incur wrath of deranged BBC reporter.

• Rupert Murdoch attempts to placate the Bancrofts by creating a special, imaginary position just for them.

• Pop culture professor Bob Thompson only gets 80 media calls a day? We get, like, 200—counting all the complaints.

• NBC continues hyping the single sponsor newscast idea it stole from ABC.

• And, in completely surprising news, Candace Bushnell's Lipstick Jungle is said to bear an uncanny resemblance to Candace Bushnell's Sex and the City.