"Enter the Trash the Dress photo session, in which the bride, post-wedding, jumps back into her gown and puts it through its paces — swimming in it, wearing it on horseback, even burning it — all while her photographer clicks away…"

As it turns out, tearing up your custom-made designer wedding gown into little tiny pieces is both therapeutic as well as extremely functional. Indeed, at least insofar as we understand it, utterly destroying your Vera Wang gown on a whim not only frees up your closet for truckloads of overpriced high-fashion ensembles that you'll buy but never wear, but will also saves you the humiliation inherent in preserving your very first wedding dress well into your second or even third marriage.

Plus, what better way to remember your (first) wedding than by gazing longingly at those pictures of you on your special day, hair besmirched and makeup smeared, dirt, grime and horse manure clinging to your tattered and torn gown?

Answer: None.

So take a cue from the ladies who lunch, grab your best pair of gardening shears and let out all that pent-out aggression on the bodice of your formfitting bridal gown. You know, for art's sake. Sure, it's not nearly as satisfying as subsequently reminding your philandering, soon-to-be-ex husband that he neglected to slap you with a prenup, but it'll certainly provide a welcome distraction from the fact that you were visibly intoxicated throughout the church proceedings.