Being bloggers, we often use inclement weather as an opportunity to cower under our bedsheets and scour the web for things other people are writing about subjects we're either too lazy (or else too uninterested) to write about ourselves.

Case in point, this excerpt from The Phoenix, which speaks derisively about the whole "Did Page Six Threaten To Date-Rape Vanessa Grigoriadis??" incident while simultaneously providing the most intense, detailed though-provoking analysis of the saga to date.

Naturally, the write-up concerns Page Six's ill-advised response to Grigoriadis' NY Mag "slam" which read: “Grigoriadis ignores the fact that half the Page Six staff is female. The male half might take her somewhere private and disprove her theory, but we don’t like a woman with a mustache.”

Observes The Phoenix:

Much virtual ink was quickly spilled on the question of precisely what this bon mot meant. The prevailing interpretation seemed to be that it was a rape threat with an asterisk: in sum, Johnson and Bill Hoffman [sic] the other guy on Page Six’s four-person staff, would prove Grigoriadis wrong by sexually assaulting her — that is, if she weren’t so (allegedly) hairy. Others noted that alternate interpretations were possible: for example, perhaps Johnson and Hoffman simply meant that they could visually prove to Grigoriadis that they weren’t castrated, or that they remain full of non-sexual vim and vigor.

Thanks for reminding us what's really important here, namely that no one has conclusively shown whether or not Vanessa Grigoriadis is, in fact, disproportionately hairy.

For the record, though, we believe the yet-unanswered question is largely immaterial. For one thing, Vanessa is married! (And otherwise not interested in copulating with any of the female-inclined Sixers). And for another, no one besides Radar (and, conceivably, Vanessa herself) even cares.

Though, for what it's worth, we've heard from a few semi-reliable sources that Hoffmann isn't nearly so discriminating in his choice of lady bedfellow as the hotly contested Page Six item would suggest.