Last night was a real treat for Intern Molly, who fought a little less harder while we were tying her to a chair and ripping the remote away from her. Why? Because the premier of 8th & Ocean plus the finale of Project Runway is like our version of a Sharon Stone threeway.

Santino yelps his last cry for mommy, while we get just a tease from the latest fuckfest to hit your home screen. We know these TV personalities are totally unreal, but you're the ones that love love love to hate them! Top 5 of the week, after the jump.

10. "I think your last note booked your plane ticket home, sweetheart."— Simon Cowell to Melissa McPhee
"Nooooo" —Drunk Paula Abdul, AI

9. "Michael, you did a terrible job, I'll let you stay for one more task, and if you do poorly, you will be fired so fast your head will spin."—Donald Trump, Apprentice

8. "Brent seems like he has been in a psychiatric ward for too long and need attention."—Pepi, Apprentice

7. "There's not a lot of people I want to see in bathrooms. Well, the women perhaps, but not the men."—Donald Trump, Apprentice

6. "When I've got only just anus, everywhere, nice boo-tay, I'll call you, and you'll be like 'oh yeaaah.'"—Adrian, 8th & Ocean

5. "It's called being a nutcase to attract people. And I'm good at it."—Brent, Apprentice

4. "Did you cup the booty when you kissed her?"—Sean
"I don't know, man."—Teddy
"You gotta cup the booty."—Sean, 8th & Ocean

3. "I sucked my thumb until I was 24 years old, and God is good and a miracle, because my teeth should literally be protruding out of your television screen."—Mandeesa, AI

2. "WHERE IS MY MOM? MY MOM IS THE SHIT!!!"—Santino, on the runway, Project Runway

1. "Kelly, you are what's known as a naughty little minx."—Simon Cowell, AI