Easy there, big spenders! Before you call up Sam Zell with yet another high-priced takeover bid for his newly acquired multimillion dollar corporation, you might be interested in know that he's not actually looking to sell.

"I said it to Eli Broad. I said it to Ron Burkle. I said it to David Geffen, and I'm saying it to you," Zell said at a conference on corporate growth.

He then quipped: "Now, if you have a price, we can talk."

Aw, thanks for thinking of us, Sam! But actually, right now we're far more focused on scraping together enough cash to cover our rent, health insurance and daily necessities. Oh, but if our financial situation changes, you'll absolutely be the second person to know.

That is, assuming Arthur Sulzberger, Jr. turns down our bid for the New York Times first.