Straight-laced trickster Stephen Colbert will make headlines for something other than being the world's most clever pretend Bill O'Reilly when the actor digitizes his DNA (what) and sends it into outer space (what) with video game designer Richard Garriott (what? No. But yes).

The Immortality Drive is part of Garriott's design to reboot the world in case of human extinction. It's going to be approximately three billion times cooler than that stupid Human Genome Project since it combines America's three favorite things: Colbert, outer space, and video games.

Where was Stephen during the first Cold War, when we could have used him to make Russia our bitch?