This is why the Internet is so great. Without it, we would have had to wait a week for the news that Paris Hilton was arrested for driving under the influence in Hollywood early this morning.
Though her publicist claims she had one margarita and was just tired, Paris was pulled over around 12:30 for "driving erratically." Of course, Paris tried to explain that's how she almost always drives.
"The officers observed that Hilton exhibited the symptoms of intoxication," Isabella said, reading a police statement. "A field sobriety test was conducted at the scene and the officers determined she was driving under the influence."
Somehow, Paris was able to get herself out of charges, because after her arrest, she was immediately released. The only people that still talk to her, Nicky and Kevin Connolly, went to pick her up. Brandon Davis would have come, but he had two margaritas, and was last seen trying to get real photos of Lohan's crotch.
Some advertisements are being banned from subways across the globe, because they have been deemed "too stimulating" or "obscene"
Too Obscene for New York Subways:
Too Stimulating for Tokyo Subways:
Proving, once again, that the desire to keep freak fetish dudes from getting hard on crowded trains is totally universal.
The MTA. Very anal. [Copyranter]
Pregnant Spears ad too "stimulating" for Tokyo metro [AP]
Oh, Haley Joel Osment. What happened to the days when he was teaching Tom Hanks to read? Now he's just a generic child star gone wild. Must be all that hanging around with Mischa Barton. (Don't let the Keds fool you, skinny bitch is crizazy.) Well, Osment is on dope. And the sauce. And he's drivin' around all Mel Gibson style through LA.
Do you see? Do you see what kind of terrible influence celebs have on our youth celebs?
At 1:20PM (PST) today the kid was charged with:
• Driving under the influence of alcohol
• Driving with a .08 blood alcohol level or higher
• Enhancement of driving with a .15 or higher
• Possession of marijuana while driving
Haley Joel Osment, 18, will be charged Thursday with misdemeanor driving under the influence of alcohol. Osment will also be charged with driving with a .08 blood alcohol level or higher, with an enhancement of driving with a .15 or higher. And Osment will be charged with misdemeanor possession of marijuana while driving. He will also be charged with the infraction of driving under the age of 21 with a blood alcohol level of .05 or higher.
The mid-day bake doesn't shock us. He's got the stoner hair. But a .08 or higher at 1:20? That would even impress our grandma! Must've been one hell of a Thursday brunch.
Haley Joel Osment To Be Charged With DUI/Pot Possession [TMZ]
• We have absolutely no idea how Anna Wintour's daughter's best friend got an internship at Vogue. Nor do we have any clue how the girl is still friend with Bee Schaffer after working for her mama. [Telegraph]
• Is Robin Williams really an alcoholic? Or does he just think he has a shot at a role in Mel Gibson and Patrick Swayze's next movie? [People]
• And why on Earth would the President of Iran want to make fun of our President? On national TV? It's not like Bush ever said anything bad about that country. We just really don't understand why everyone hates us! [CBS]
• It's true. James Truman steals his employees away from the competition the old fashion way: through his powers of seduction. [NYO]
• Yay, yay, it's national underwear day. Stock up on some skivvies … you never know who might be picturing you in you underthings. [Gothamist]
• New York Press discovers the true factor behind obesity: weed delivery and television. [FBNY]
Star magazine is reporting that Jew hater Mel Gibson is checking himself into rehab for his blatant abuse of alcohol. We assume this is to help rehabilitate his image of "total asshole," and maybe help him stop chugging so much of the sauce. And then driving. And then yelling anti-Semitic comments. His neighbor, Chris Prentiss, thinks this is a fabulous idea, especially because Gibson becomes an entirely different person when he drinks — the true sign of a bad alchie.
"Statements that Mel Gibson made are a result of alcohol changing Mel Gibson into that kind of a person.
"The Mel Gibson that we all know is not that kind of a person. When alcohol enters his system he becomes an out of control, belligerent, nasty guy. It's not Mel Gibson's life. Most of time, 99.9 percent of time he is fine upstanding gentlemanly person."
So, even though he's only drunk .1 percent of the time, during that time he suddenly remembers that he hates Jewish people. We're not entirely sure rehab can erase that, but we wish the guy luck.
MEL IN RECOVERY PROGRAM [Star Magazine]
• Finally, we can start drinking at 8 am on Sunday morning. How in the world did New York go so long without this law? [ABC]
• We almost recommended checking out this very interesting New York Times article … until we got down to the part where they call the South Bronx "SoBro." Can we please make it stop before we're calling New York NeYo? [NYT]
• What's so special about August 14? Oh not too much — just that Boy George will be sweeping your street. [NYDN]
• Brooklyn is officially a real place in New York. Even tourists want to see how the outer burroughed live. [Newsday]
• Brooke Astor's son Anthony Marshall reminds NYC heavyweights that it's not nice to around telling the papers how badly he's mistreating him. Some people just have no manners. [NYP]
• Anyone remember laughter? Upright Citizens Brigade does. Please tell us you remember them. (Thurs. 7/25) [Irving Plaza]
• Nothing like sitting outside and crying tears of pain and abuse with a whole bunch of strangers. (Wed. 7/26) [NYM]
• Ever wonder what it was like to sleep with Andy Warhol? (Besides risky, that is.) You can ask Maura Moynihan. She'll probably slap you, but it's worth asking. (7/25) [FreeCityEvents]
• Who says we aren’t a family friendly site? Bring the kids to see Harry Potter … and try to stalk celebs like Sarah Jessica Parker and Michelle Williams. (7/28) [FreeNYC]
• And because we're really not that family friendly, we of course have your weekly dose of cheap beer. Plus, this joint just reminds us of the Peach Pit after dark.(Everyday) [Anytime]
• Watch as Anderson Cooper and Charlie Rose go head to head. Although alcohol isn't served at this event, it'll definitely be a superior experience if you're tanked. (Tues. 6/27) [NYM]
• Who said white boys can't rap? Who said white British boys can't rap? Mike Skinner wants to prove you all wrong. (Tues. 6/27) [Loose Record]
• When it's Joan Didion depression is almost fun. (Fri. 6/30) [Summer Stage]
• Need a guaranteed Jake Gyllenhaal sighting? Go listen to his dad Steven Gyllenhaal read. And ask for Jake's number. And to see baby pictures of him. Steve would love it. (Wed. 6/28) [Used Book Cafe]
• No GYWO is complete without free booze. And in honor of the holiday weekend, these environmentally conscious folk want to give you free Brooklyn beer. (Sun. 7/2) [MyOpenBar]
Update: Unfortch, Anderson Cooper won't be attending tonight's reading. Bad east coast weather (where? what?) is keeping him trapped in New Orleans. But Don't toss that ticket stub just yet (like you ever would). Use it at the rescheduled event on Thursday, June 29 at 7 pm or cash it in tonight to see Charlie Rose interview Kevin Spacey. Heh, not a bad deal, right? 92Y's Andrew Krucoff has the full report.
• Yes Pat Benatar is still alive! She still has a few years before she suffers from terrible death of irrelevance. (Tues. 6/10) [StubHub]
• Come watch the future of the journalism pondered over by premier writers. The only downer? It's a dry event. (Thurs. 6/22) [NYM]
• For the less prestigious riff-raff readers, however, you may want to hit up the open bar at this reading tonight. (Tues. 6/22) [MyOpenBar]
• The only reason to ever, ever go to Williamsburg: Billyburg Short Film Festival. Or, the $1 beers. Take your pick. (Sat. 6/24) [Rabbit in a Turtleshell]
• What better way to kick off summer than catching a minor league baseball game in the BK? Come on! These guys are younger, (probably) hotter, and much cheaper than the Yanks. [NYT]
• On her new album, Beyonce describes her love life as "boring." Don't worry Jay-Z, she likes it like that. [Billboard]
• We guess Cristal won't be making an appearance in any upcoming Cribs episodes either. [HipHopGame]
• Great, now we'll probably have to hear a rap album from Jacob the Jeweler. [MTV]
• Oh, Justin Timberlake. You were so much cooler when you hung out with Ashton Kutcher. And that's really not saying very much. [AP]
• Spin doctor DJ AM finds himself a new, less famous, less skinny, groupie girlfriend. [Page Six]
• See Liev Schreiber on stage for the first time since, well, ever. (6/13-7/09) [NYM]
• We know what you're thinking: Moonshot Beer sounds suspiciously like moonshine. But if they're giving it away for free at The Delancey, we'll be there. Especially if it will get us as drunk as Moonshine would. (Tue. 6/13) [MyOpenBar]
• The Burlesque show at South Paw in Park Slope 'aint cheap, but usually you get what you pay for. Stripping in the summer is so much more fun anyways. (Fri. 6/16) [Southpaw Sounds via Brooklyn Record]
• Okay, we know the US got spanked yesterday against the Czech, but if there's anything that gets us patriotic, it's soccer. (Sat. 6/17) [ESPN]
Today on CNN's free in flight videos, you have your choice of entertainment. 1) Strippers being stabbed to death 2) Little girls getting their hands chopped off, and 3) Doctors selling off body parts.
In other news, the pot of coffee we drank this morning is really helping our body process the crappy wine Rodale was serving last night.
Watch Free [CNN]
• It baffles us why Fran Drescher has been allowed to exist this long without having gotten some type of voice-box surgery. But maybe its better to hear her screech in a theater house? (6/8-6/24) [NYM]
• What were once vaccination shots feared by 3 year-olds everywhere (Measles, Mumps, Rubella) are now just a couple of musicians looking to rock out. (Thurs. 6/8) [Oh My Rockness]
• This isn't so much a weekly event as it is a natural phenomenon that proves God doesn't completely despise us. Yup, free wine all day everyday! We so heart summer. [My Open Bar]
• Fly gals, it's time to get your nails done and your hair did. Shecky's has discounts galore … just in time for bikini season if you know what we mean. (Ex Cargo boys are welcome to attend, too.) (6/12-6/18) [Sheckys]
• Is it just us, or does a huge block party/BBQ in Midtown just scream total chaos? (Sat.-Sun. 6/10-6/11) [Big Apple BBQ]
• Everyone went nuts over Page Six editor Richard Johnson's DUI on Friday … but seemed to have forgotten about his prior. [NYO]
• NYC Judge to plaintiff: "shellfish have shells." Jossip to Jessica Simpson: "you are not alone." [NYP]
• Because poor kids are stupid and don't deserve to learn, parents of NEST students shake their maracas and try to protect their chosen gifted children from an eroding future. [NYT]
• Oh, come on. Stop complaining. If they're old enough to go to summer school, kids are old enough to take the subway there. Unless the MTA strikes again. Then we're all screwed. [NYDN]
• Please keep the disgusting smell of clean clothes to yourself. Nobody wants to breath in the scent of your spring fresh underthings. [Curbed]
Yeah, yeah, we all know the story. Last Thursday night, Page Six editor Richard Johnson was pulled over and was slapped with a DUI after leaving Soho House. While the greater crime may be driving a Ford Escape, the story of what and how much Richard had to drink is still a little murky.
Mr. Johnson told the officer that he had just come from the Soho House, a members-only club in the meatpacking district, and that he had drunk a glass of wine. He refused to take a Breathalyzer test, according to court records, and was taken into custody.
But then, Richard's lawyers decides to throw his two cents in the bucket. And the story, while sticking to the 'might have had one drink' idea, sort of makes it look like an multiple choice test in seventh grade health classes. (You know, the class where you learn a pint of beer, a glass of wine, or a shot of liquor will get you equally not buzzed so that you can still drive? It's the same class where, to the disappointment of Joe Francis, they taught girls that showers won't make them sober.)
Mr. Johnson's lawyer, Edward Hayes, said that Mr. Johnson played basketball on Thursday evening before going to the Soho House for a birthday party; there, Mr. Hayes said, he "might have had a beer."
Now all we need is for Richard Johnson's basketball buddies to come around and say he may have only had a tequila shot or three.
Page Six Editor Charged With Drunken Driving [Kareem Fahim, New York Times]
Earier: Richard Johnson Keeps Fridays Interesting
Today, the New York Times again tackles their favorite subject — the gym. Can you pick somebody up at the gym? Some say no. Unlike the Jane Fonda thong and Jon Travolta crotch huggers gym days of the 80's, today's gym members are chubbier, older, and too stressed out to have a sex drive.
But, others are more optimistic about meeting their dream guy or gal on the rowing machine. Hey, it happened to Miranda Hobbes and that hottie from her workout world.
"You can find similar people, whether they're in the same income bracket or time schedule or a healthy person," Ms. Brown said. "It's not a bad place to meet someone. It just doesn't happen very much."
A gym can be a good outlet to meet someone "because there's no alcohol involved," said Brooke Temner, 26, a beauty publicist who belongs to a Crunch gym on the East Side of Manhattan.
No alcohol involved? Wait, wouldn't that explain why it's a bad place to meet someone. We bet back in the day (when people hooked up on the bench press) Jane had a few g+ts before getting herself into some of those positions … not mention the outfits.
Don't Hit on Me, Mr. Goodbody [Melena Ryzik, New York Times]
The cocktail turned 200 years old yesterday — and while no afficionado of a great mixed and shaken beverage will ever live that long, New York Times writer Jonathan Miles lived long enough to sing the praises of martinis, capirinhias, and of course, Manhattans, in yesterday's paper.
For most, cocktails are as familiar to New York as Yellow cabs, umbrellas, or Louis Vuitton bags. They have gone through phases and fads … even if the only one we really remember is the Sex and the City cosmo.
Ok, so, maybe we've only been of legal drinking age for a year or two. But we know enough to know that the Sunday Styles section is correct — booze is absolutely a New York City staple. It is your present for living here … you need alcohol just to survive a day in this place.
"Great cocktails are one of the rewards of living here. And," he added, "one of the necessities of living here."
We couldn't have said it better ourselves. An in light of this article – which reminded everyone how much we need alcohol to get by – please be sure to show up to your AA meeting early today to guarantee a seat.
Cocktail, the Bicentennial [Jonathan Miles, New York TImes]
Sure, the Tribeca Film Festival is just around the corner, but first we've got smaller players to field — namely the Gen Art Film Festival. The Acura-heavy week-long event was sure to have some pleasantries, as evidenced by last night's screening of Shut Up And Sing, where the ensemble cast of Molly Shannon & Co. proved there's more to laugh at the Hamptons about than coked up publicists at Star Room. (And kudos to to the cast for having everyone show up.)
But that's not where the fun ends, especially when Colin Farrell's involved. You remember him from such films as Phone Booth, Alexander, and, oh yeah, that porn flic with Nicole Narain.
The recovering alcoholic – who wrapped Miami Vice before entering rehab for pain killer dependency in December – showed up Thursday night to catch Wristcutters: A Love Story at the Clearview West cinema in Chelsea. And while Open All Night was reporting the just-out-of-rehab Irishman sipped only Coca-Cola across the street at the Westside Tavern before the movie, we hear his imbibing at the afterparty at BED wasn't typical of a supposed teetotaler.
No doubt sipping plenty of the sponsor-provided Johnny Walker Black Label (or was it Citroc vodka?), Farrell spent the evening getting sloshed — to the dismay of the hoards of publicists catering to every aspect of the event. Noticeably absent? Farrell's own publicist, Danica Smith, who we hear actually phoned in before the event to request handlers escort Colin from the party if he got out of control. In the end, that's exactly what happened when the Black Label started looking like colors of the rainbow.
Un-fact-checked gossip for gossip's sake? We've seen Brokeback Mountain like 10 times, ok? We have nothing else to live for.
So, somebody should get Lizzy Grubman's lawyer on the phone. More drunk blondes are supposedly slamming into shit with their cars.
A well-lubricated Tara Reid was seen outside of Dennis Rodman's Newport Beach house on Wednesday morning, paying off a local resident after slamming into their car.
According to our eyewitness, Ms. Reid's "pupils were clearly dialated, for what reason I don't know." After exiting their respective vehicles, Tara told the owner of the other vehicle that she "didn't want to deal with insurance," and promptly handed the gentleman $700 dollars to "forget it ever happened."
We got over our initial shock of Dennis Rodman's house on Newport Beach, and then bam! Tara Reid carrying wads of cash? Where the hell did Tartrashtic get 700 bucks?
The only thing we figure is that people must paying her to please keep her clothes on.
TARA REID HITS NEIGHBORS CAR LEAVING RODMANS NEWPORT BEACH CRIB! [Togawp]
Continuing our brand new feature Press Release Parade – wherein we dump needless (and thankless) attempts at generating buzz into your lap – we're pleased to bring you the latest flack-heavy note we received. Scraped from our inbox today:
I noticed that you are a big fan of Project Runway and often comment on it. Here is a fun idea for your readers…..
New Yorker's always find a reason to party! This Wednesday, Bravo will be airing the Project Runway Season Finale. This seasons finale party should be as stylish as the clothes and trends that walk down the runway - so what better way than to make your own party stylish than with the most "ubiquitous fashion accessory of New York Fashion Week" - the Ecco-tini, as featured in the Wall Street Journal.
The fashion forward Ecco-tini features the attractively priced, 2005 Ecco Domani Pinot Grigio served in a stylish martini glass with skewed white grapes. Ecco Domani is available at retailers nationwide at a suggested price of $11. Please find an image attached.
Don't get us wrong — we're truly appreciative the note was personalized for our benefit. Any flack who cares is certainly a friend of ours.
Earlier: Press Release Parade: M.C. Hammer regains relevance for one night only
Editorial Director
