• Attention groupies: As thrilling as the prospect of demeaning drug-induced sex with a washed-up rock star is, you may want to watch out for those musicians who warn, "I remember spending most of my days off in and out of a variety of VD clinics."

• Awww…Kim Kardashian's younger sis wants to grow up to be just like her!

• Remember when ads used to cut through all the bullshit and say exactly what we meant? Like this vintage Coca Cola ad, that reminds us (and Dina Lohan) that it's never too early to start your child on a heavy coke regimen.

• Ali Landry's dress would be a whole lot prettier if she hadn't accidentally sat on the lacy black tablecloth.

• Eva Mendes gets "tastefully" topless for Maxim magazine.

• When people talk about gun control, they're not talking abstractly about an individual's right to bear arms. They're talking about psychos like T.I.