• Waaaah! My name's Megan Fox and everyone keeps comparing me to gorgeous movie stars based purely on my amazing looks. Waaaah!"
• Scary Spice is secretly married. And Eddie Murphy, for one, is ecstatic.
• Nope, Amanda Bynes hasn't been traipsing around town dressed in mini-skirts and see-through tops because she's a slut. It's because she's launching her own whore-tastic new clothing line!
• Girls Aloud? More like, "No girls allowed—who don't look good in skintight spandex." Zing!
• It's a sad day when Angelina's 2 year-old daughter maybe, sorta picking her nose qualifies as "news."
• We can't decide whether Beyonce is truly bootilicious, or just pear-shaped.
Last week was, as always, another dizzying frenzy of gossip and media-related news. We gave you our up-to-the-minute take, but we're far more interested in your reactions. Please continue to send us your comments, and every Monday we'll recap the burning issues and a sampling of your "colorful" responses in "Hot Topics."
• Issue: Star Mag predicts Jennifer "New Nose" Aniston's next love connection.
• You said: "I'm not so sure Cusack's her "type" either, ifyouknowwhatimean…"
• You also said: "I think Lance Armstrong might say the same thing about Jake…"
• Issue: CNN defends Paris Hilton 360 against its harsh (Fox) critics
• You said: "The facts speak for themselves; Anderson Cooper has more credibility and he's a LOT easier on the eyes than Greta Van Sucksteren."
• Issue: Paris Hilton's lost video archives prove she's not a fan of "little, jappy jews."
• You said: "Paris? All I see is a disloyal, jealous, lying prostitute with a soul of poison ice."
• Issue: Amanda Bynes is involved in a car crash; a bunch of commenters inexplicably jump to Brandy's defense.
• You said: "It doesn't say if she even caused the car crash. It IS possible that she was just an innocent party. I meant Amanda Bynes btw…"
• Issue: We made an (apparently unfunny) comment about Patrick Dempsey's kids' names, and were summarily accused of hating Irish people.
• You said: "I didn't mean to imply that you were being anti-celt, simply idiotic…"
According to TMZ, She's The Man star Amanda Bynes was involved in yet another celebrity car crash. Fortunately, she looks to be alirght, but we figured we'd take a look at all the facts just to be on the safe side.
Car-Crash Review Checklist:
• Multiple cars (Check)
• Pseudo-famous celebrity (Check)
• Police on the scene (Check)
• No deaths, or reports of vehicular manslaughter (Check)
• No $50 million lawsuits from the person-you-just-ran-over's family (Check)
And that, Brandy, is how it's done.
• Ya gotta give credit to those wacky "Gate" keepers, Christo & Jeanne-Claude. They're recycling the orange pipe frames holding up the shower curtains (err, we mean art) as white fence posts.
• Nightlife-cum-restaurateur Amy Sacco agreed to be civil with Gawker's Jessica Coen at their BlackBook fashion shoot, but that doesn't mean she prefers the gossip blog to the "99 percent of the time" accurate Page Six.
• The bad news: NYU is losing fashion challenged Mary-Kate Olsen as a coed. The good news: Amanda Bynes has signed on to keep the tween quota afloat. And Mark Graham needs a moment to himself.
• With two TV shows, Tyra Banks doesn't have time (or youth) for the runway. Her Nov. 9 Victoria's Secret show is expected to be her last, while Heidi Klum will make her catwalk return since ducking out to give birth.
• Elle Macpherson has her lawyers scrambling to get her out of her Blackglama contract, now that PETA has shown her how she really gets her mink coats.
• Kate Moss Watch™: If the supermodel goes to jail, she may have a familiar pen pal in ex-boyfriend Pete Doherty. Police detained the druggie rocker during a raid at his U.K. concert.
• Brad Pitt and Jennifer Aniston rang in their official divorce (as of yesterday) by unloading their Beverly Hills pad, collecting a whopping $28 million for their $13.5 million payment back in 2001.
• O.J. Simpson might be free, but the man's broke. The acquitted ex-football star rang in the 10th anniversary of his trial's ending by charging $95 per John Hancock at a – gasp! – horror convention.
