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Jossip Juxtaposition: Maggie Gyllenhaal To Make an Uncle Out of Jake

Oprah is totally fine with having a ton of money. Then again, we don't really know anyone who isn't. [People]

New York magazine's goddess of sex, Amy Sohn, is giving up her hardcore fetishes for baby talk. Boo. [NYO]

Peter Saargard is officially off the market — after knocking up Maggie Gyllenhaal, he presents her with a ring. The good news is "Uncle Jake" has such a sexy ring to it. [AP]

• Somehow we doubt that Angelina Jolie really gives a shit about what Jennifer Aniston has to say. Especially since she's having a baby that'll be more important than Jesus. [SFG]

• Why would anyone stalk Elizabeth Hasselbeck? It's almost as boring as stalking George Clooney. [Lowdown]

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