• Lindsay Lohan's pal has been slutting around with her sort-of boyfriend!
• Turns out, Cameron Diaz did not enjoy her very public breakup with Justin Timberlake.
• Hardworking single mom Pamela Anderson takes a break from parenting to bump and grind with a tattooed K-Fed lookalike.
• Meanwhile, former NBA legend Michael Jordan's "game" has severely deteriorated; the baller was recently spotted throwing himself at uninterested women and introducing himself as "Leroy."
• Barbara Bush pisses off her twin sister by earning the nickname "presidential pixie" and fitting into "tight jeans and a sexy top."
CONTINUED »
Larry Birkhead "told you so," and he's collecting on his Anna Nicole capital.
Now that he's officially the father of Dannielynn, he'll be cashing a $1.7 million cheque, reports Marc Malkin, courtesy of OK! magazine, who won the "ferocious bidding war" for the exclusive photos and interview, as one tabloid insider called it. "People brought everything to the table … and [I don't think] most people still know how they lost out." Perhaps a little something to do with the large sums of cash at editor Sarah Ivens disposal?
• Congratulations to Sanjaya Malakar, on being named Maxim online's "Girl of the Day!" (Bonus points for describing the pony-hawked "singer" as "an androgynous American Idol stowaway."
• Marilyn Manson describes his barely legal girlfriend as his "double," possibly referring to the fact that he's double her age.
• Lindsay Lohan enjoys a moment of complete solitude. And naturally, the hordes of paparazzi—who follow her every waking move—are right there to capture it.
• Also, Lindsay may or may not be a lesbian, depending on your definition of DJ Samantha Ronson.
CONTINUED »
• John Travolta and his Scientologist publicist Paul Bloch insist the actor is promoting Hairspray on Good Morning America simply because they asked first. It's has nothing to do with the Today show (where he castmates are appearing) and that Tom Cruise interview. Nothing.
• J. Lo's camp denies any notion of a split with Marc Anthony.
• Willa Ford set to play the rich, big-breasted blonde who recently died.
• Joe Francis indicted on two counts of tax evasion. Apparently the $3.78 million spent on his home in Punta Mita, Mexico, was not a valid business expense.
• Pink is suffering from the Dixie Chick's effect.
CONTINUED »
Five weeks ago, the editorial team at In Touch (which includes EIC Richard Spencer and exec editor Dan Wakeford) stitched together an Anna Nicole Smith item aptly titled "Inside Anna Nicole's diary," where – with much help from the art department – a composite of the late blonde's private writings was printed in the March 19 issue. Brilliant, eye-catching stuff, as far as the print gossips are concerned. (Click the image for a larger version.)
So brilliant, in fact, that if you fast forward to this week, the editorial team at another tabloid seems to have mimicked the whole concept.
CONTINUED »
All those tabloid shows that insist on popping up around 7pm, just as you're settling in for a couple Law & Orders on TiVo before Lost comes on? Yeah, they're not doing so well. Ratings are dipping for all that syndicated fare, including daytime's Live With Regis & Kelly and Dr. Phil. (Oprah, of course, is doing alright.)
But then there are two shining exceptions to the rule, and their names aren't Inside Edition or Access Hollywood.
CONTINUED »
• After seven years on Court TV, Catherine Crier Live is no longer. Must be something to do with those action-packed reality shows they're going after.
• Tom Ford gives private tour of new store to fashion editors, where even Cathy Horyn was welcome.
• More about FNC's Red Eye than you probably care to know.
• Time Out New York's Eat Out Awards honor the restaurants you've learned to avoid.
CONTINUED »
Whatever the results are of Inside Edition's polygraph test with supposed Anna Nicole Smith baby daddy Frederick von Anhalt, they're probably worth ignoring.
That's because IE has enlisted the help of Edward I. Gelb, a lie detector test administer who has the folks at AntiPolygraph.org – a non-profit org aimed at exposing the loopholes in polygraphing – riled up. Though Gelb has appeared on Entertainment Tonight, Geraldo Rivera Live, and Larry King Live, it's arguable he did so under false pretenses.
Something about Gelb claiming to be a Ph.D. but not sharing which institution actually accredited him or answer questions about it. As if the Anna Nicole saga needs another personality to disbelieve.
• Jenna Jameson's weight loss is upsetting fans. That's fans, plural.
• Paris Hilton's attorney goes on yet another attack defending his client's genital health and pill intake.
• Tom Cruise's first move to resurrect goodwill of the public: play a Nazi.
• Larry Birkhead continues milking Anna Nicole story, to the tune of $650k in legal bills.
• Kevin Connolly and Haylie Duff get close enough on a red carpet to fuel rumors of them being together.
• Adding to earlier reports of a budding romance, we spotted Josh Hartnett and Penelope Cruz entering cheesesteak factory Wogie's in the West Village with a third, unidentified guest.
Because Larry Birkhead's Anna Nicole Smith saga ceases to end, so too will that of Frederick von Anhalt, better known as Zsa Zsa Gabor's husband, who claims to have had an affair with Smith and may also be the father of baby Dannielynn.
Cue Inside Edition, hopeful to get in on the ratings fun The Insider and Entertainment Tonight have enjoyed (and paid for). We hear IE strapped down von Anhalt to a polygraph test on Friday at 2pm — a time frame agreed upon so he could keep a lunch date with the wife, says a source.
Meanwhile, an insider claims Zsa Zsa has no idea her husband submitted to a lie detector test. But when the results are announced on Tuesday's show, perhaps Frederick will have the decency to invite her to tune in.
Are you sorry about the media's temporary obsession with Anna Nicole Smith? Shocked, perhaps, by the unrelenting coverage of the death, custody battle and funeral, the damning evidence inside her refrigerator, or the ever-increasing numbers of potential baby daddies? Alarmed that an overzealous cable news media turned courtroom embarrassment Judge Larry Seidlin into a household name (and, in all likelihood, a television personality?)
Jack Shafer isn't
According to Shafer, there's nothing wrong with giving the people what they want. And in the hours, days and even weeks following Smith's death, the people wanted Anna.
More interesting, however, is Shafer's reasoning behind Anna's mass appeal. It's not, as most would (incorrectly!) assume, because Smith was "a bosomy, semifamous blonde who checked out at the age of 39."
CONTINUED »
We admit it. We are absolutely, positively 100% obsessed with Law & Order. From the pre-Sam Waterston days to the wisecracking Jerry Orbach era to the especially heinous sexually based offenses (and Star Jones cameos) we can't get enough!*
However, the one Law & Order spin-off we never really got into was Criminal Intent.** (Something about Vincent D'Onofrio's large, hulking frame—and the absence of B.D. Wong—just kinda rubbed us the wrong way).
But we'll definitely be tuning in on May 8th to see their (completely fictional! Not at all reality-based!) take on Anna Nicole Smith.
CONTINUED »
Say, remember Larry Seidlin, the zany, highly emotional and occasionally sexist Florida circuit judge who theatrically (and through intermittent tears) awarded custody of Anna Nicole Smith's body to her infant daughter, Dannielynn?
Well, looks like he's one step closer to doing what he does best: delivering bizarre, tear-streaked verdicts that demonstrate a complete and utter lack of jurisprudence, legal savvy or coherent thought…all in the name of good television.
Seidlin, who was reportedly "inundated with at least 200 phone inquiries from TV recruiters" (including CBS) is now said to be squeezing in a barrage of production meetings on the west coast.
The objective?
CONTINUED »
• Band-aid heriess Casey Johnson was "devastated" to find out she couldn't adopt the 2 1/2 year-old child she'd bonded with for three (whole!) weeks. Luckily, there are other fish in the sea!
• Turns out disgraced Tyco chief Dennis Kozlowski is one funny jailbird!
• A Mayan women criticizes Apocalypto for its historical inaccuraces; Gibson fires back by pleasantly suggesting that she "fuck off."
• Janice Dickinson returns to what she does bust: crazy, incoherent rants.
• When Kirk Douglas walks into a room, you'd better start clapping.
• Gwen Stefani to guest-mentor on American Idol; Sanjaya to immediately stake his claim on "I'm Just A Girl."
• What really caused Anna Nicole Smith's death? The tabloids say they've got the scoop forensic experts can only dream about!
• Sarah Jessica isn't making crappy bargain basement clothes; she's making fashion democracy!
• Obnoxiously loud celebrities and Charlie Sheen embrace 9/11 conspiracy theories.
• "The Diary of Anna Nicole Smith" sells for upwards of $500K. And she couldn't even read good!
• Jared Paul Stern sticks to his revenge guns, elects to sue the entire world over that whole nasty extortion episode.
• The debut of Apple TV makes us unreasonable angry with our Sony Vaio.
• Internet maestro Abbe Diaz launches members-only online club for people who identify as "the help."
• In surprising posthumous news…Anna Nicole Smith may or may not have mothered—and, presumably, abandoned—a mysterious Native American lovechild.
• And speaking of death, despite (apparently) false reports claiming that she'd kicked the bucket, it would appear that Winona Ryder will live to shoplift another day.
• A timeline of Elisabeth Hasselbeck's televised waterworks!. Crazy coincidence: Hasselbeck's emotionally-powered performances seem to occur approximately once a month…
• Madonna's former nanny to write a tell-all! But is there really anything about Madge that we don't already know? (Who cares, you know the gays will read it.)
CONTINUED »
As we do our best to avoid All Things Anna Nicole, one peculiar incident has perked our interest. It's no secret that Entertainment Tonight and The Insider have beaten this story to, ahem, death, but MSNBC's Rita Cosby has also been on the beat. And perhaps she's been going at it a little too hard.
A report from ETonline.com about the private gathering at the Villa Florentine after Anna's funeral – where ET cameras were the only ones allowed inside! – called out Cosby for being booted from the affair because she wasn't on Howard K. Stern’s guest list (as ICN fills in). The quote from the article is:
At one point in the reception, MSNBC's RITA COSBY — a guest of Virgie's — allegedly snuck into the affair, but was quickly escorted out.
Except you'd be hard pressed to find that quote again — as it's been removed from the story. The only way we happened upon it was via ETonline.com's search feature.
Looks like there was one hurried call from one pissed off MSNBC publicist.
• Antonella Barba may not have the best set of pipes, but apparently her other "assets" helped the Idol wannabe skate through another elimination.
• And in related news, former AI contestant Kellie Pickler performed on the show last night. "Have you spent any money since being on the show?" Ryan Seacrest asks her breast implants.
• Meanwhile, inspired by Kellie/Antonella's leads, Jesse Metcalfe shows off his man-boobs.
• Anna Nicole Smith is finally buried. And in true ANS style, she's wearing a tiara and beaded gown.
• Rosie O'Donnell apologizes for her co-star's propensity to inappropriately burst into tears.
• Britney takes time out of busy rehabbing schedule to go on a shopping spree, y'all!
• Babe magnet Scott Storch proves he's even sadder than we thought by releasing a "diss track" against hip-hop producer Timbaland.
• Mary Kate and Ashley Olsen put their twin heads together, come up with a way to charge $175 for a t-shirt.
• Both Howard K. Stern and Larry Birkhead attend Anna Nicole Smith's funeral, but only Stern wears a pink-ribbon on his lapel to symbolize how much he misses her bank account.
• Michael Richards goes on a crazy racist rant. Yadda yadda yadda, a bunch of obsessed Seinfeld fans incorporate it into the show.
• Astro-Nut gets off scot-free; Paris Hilton now "even less worried" about doing jail-time.
• Jane cancels it's Mammory Glands photo shoot after Wednesday's BreastGate scandal.
• The never-particularly-attractive Ray Liotta gets nip/tucked for no apparent reason.
Editorial Director
