This morning started off with so much crack and prostitution, we sort of feel like we're in a snow globe with Lindsay Lohan and Kate Moss. Of course, not our crack and prostitution, but that of people we lovingly refer to as authors.
Seriously, the literary world really can get so Bret Easton Ellis on our asses sometimes. First, James Frey was only pretending to be on drugs, and now JT LeRoy's public persona is really his sister, Savannah Knoop. (So, there's New York magazine's million dollar answer.)
According to some people at the Times, if your public persona is not you, then you may not exist, and then the real writer might be somebody like, say, Courtney Love.
Maybe it's the drugs, or being sold down the Florida freeway, but these authors and their little reality/imagination complex and pesky fabrications make us want to start our Monday off with a coupla' percocets and a shot of whiskey.
Unfortunately, as the saying goes, there's so much coke and cross-dressing to blog about, so little time to get rocked.
The Unmasking of JT Leroy: In Public, He's a She [Warren St. John, NYT]
• Sensitivity challenged Kimberly Stewart strikes again. In the October issue of Stuff, the wanna-be starlet let loose on Heather Mills McCartney, the amputee and activist. "What has three legs and lives on a farm?" Rod Stewart's daughter snarks. "Paul McCartney and his wife." Now what has a saggy ass and pays for friends?
• We can't decide whether Tara Reid is more famous for her awful boob job or her party girl antics, but E! settled the debate for us: She's not famous enough, which is why they canned her Taradise.
• Overexposed author Bret Easton Ellis didn't have quite the experience Anna Wintour did on the Today show. Instead of being quizzed by Matt Lauer (who split to Iraq), Katie Couric conducted the questioning, which left Ellis sneering: "She was such a bitch to me, I couldn't believe it." But the knees! Oh, the knees.
• Blinging up baby! The upcoming spawn of Britney Spears and K-Fed is going to be decked out in a designer wardrobe, courtesy Donatella Versace. No doubt Ms. Versace was enticed by the challenge of creating low riders and tacky T-shirts for the infant set.
• It's 10 counts of fraud for Survivor's first winner Richard Hatch, who notoriously omitted his $1 million winnings plus other compensation. He faces up to 75 years in prison — or eating two dozen balut eggs.
• Tonight's hour-long Hurricane Katrina telethon won't feature any special precautions, except for a five or seven second delay, to ward off any Kanye copycats. Or West himself, who's on the roster.
• Voletta Wallace, mother of Notorious B.I.G., doesn't have very nice things to say about her deceased son's friends Sean Combs and Lil' Kim, and she's using her upcoming memoir to spit. As for Diddy: "Sean loved my son–after he was dead."
