"Have you seen baby Shiloh?" wonders a concerned citizen/stalker over at Life & Style. "Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt's adorable daughter was last spotted on Oct. 7, when Brad lifted her into the air at the Waldorf-Astoria hotel in New York City." (Strange! We were always told that what goes up, must eventually come down!)
How, you might wonder, does father-slash-famous person Will Smith feel about his children's career aspirations? Answer: As proud as notoriously coiffed boxing promoter Don King is on the eve of a Pay-Per-View fight night!
Quoth the Smith: "'Jaden is [like] Johnny Depp. He just wants to do good work … He loves acting, he just wants to make good movies. And Willow is Pars Hilton,' Smith says, laughing. 'Willow wants to be on TV.'"
Meanwhile, we're just glad to see the doting dad loves his two children for who they really are. And that he's totally not pushing them to solicit the public spotlight, model themselves after an eccentric modelizer-turned-gay pirate and an underwear-deprived hotel heiress or expect overnight success in a highly competitive, soul-crushing industry.
Did you know that the youngest Hanson boy (Zac, the one who played the drums) and his wife Kate are expecting their first child in early May? Naturally, we're thrilled for the happy couple—and dumbstruck by the realization that Baby Hanson is actually 22 years-old—but we're actually more surprised to learn that the seemingly early bloomer is actually the last of the band of brothers to procreate. Reports People:
The newest addition to the Hanson family romper room will join Ezra, 5, Penelope, 2, River, 1 (middle brother Taylor, 24 and his wife Natalie's children) and Everett, 7 months (eldest brother Isaac, 27, and his wife Nicki's son). "It will be really fun to see five little ones grow up together," says Zac. "I know watching them is going to inspire a lot of music."
Wait, so the cherubic middle brother, Taylor (whom many mistook for a beautiful girl) and the older one, Isaac (best known as "the one who actually went through puberty") are already married with three rugrats between them? Craziness! Even more surprising? Zac's revelation that they're still making music. And here we thought they simply ceased to exist after "MmmBop."
• Tyra Banks is worried that prospective suitors will wig out after discovering that she's not so much "fierce" as she is overweight and bald.
• Stop it, Amy Winehouse. You're not fooling anyone! At least, not anymore…
• Ever wondered how Rumers get started? This totally explains it.
• Britney's lawyer asked a judge this morning if his client's meddling "driving without a license" thing could be stayed until January 1st.
• Good thing, too! Us Weekly's omnipresent paparazzi caught the brake-impaired pop star running three stop signs later that very same day. (For her part, Brit insists that she "totally paused!")
• Find out what a hot, marginally intelligent person thought of Live Free Or Die Hard.
It's official. Britney Spears has finally lost custody of her two children, Sean Preston and Jayden James, who have been ordered to stay with their father "until further order of the court."
According to E! Online:
Federline is seeking primary physical custody of the youngsters over concern for his boys' well-being, claiming the youngsters are in a less than safe environment while under their mother's watch.
Friends of Spears are already characterizing Britney's recent slew of erratic and self-destructive behavior as "tragic." Meanwhile, legal experts prefer to look at it as the makings of "the easiest case of all time."
Jennifer Lopez refuses to "officially" admit her pregnancy, continues to hide her ever-growing fetus underneath flowy empire tops and billowy dresses that also double as Elton John's shower curtains. [Stereohyped]
Congratulations, Baby Sean Preston, for finally having the good sense to shove your pacifier into your mother's pie-hole. Sure, it's not quite as good as letting her borrow the London's (the gimpy, three and a half-footed Yorkie pup) doggie-muzzle, but — by God! — it's a start. [Mollygood]
Did you know that being the 19 year-old equestrian daughter of a maybe-prejudiced tv pundit qualifies you as borderline newsworthy? Hillary Dobbs does!
The Harvard sophomore and bareback rider (of horses, silly!) saw her name in the papers for the third time in less than a week this morning, this time for accomplishing the rather remarkable feat of falling ass-backwards off her horse during the Hamptons Classic Grand Prix.
Fortunately, Hillary and her Ivy League education both emerged from the impromptu roll in the hay completely intact. In fact, Dobbs will even be competing in a Boston event just next weekend! Which is super convenient, actually, because we could swear we read somewhere that she goes to school right nearby…
PS. Did we mention that she goes to Harvard? Because she does.
Brad Pitt tells a gaggle of not-particularly-awestruck reporters that he and Angelina Jolie are ready for their fifth child in less than three years.
“It’s the most fun I’ve ever had and also the biggest pain … I’ve ever experienced,” he said when asked what it was like to become a father to four children in such a short period of time. “I love it and can’t recommend it any more highly — although sleep is nonexistent.”
Sure! For the four nannies (soon to be five!) that Brangelina hired to "help" raise their ever-growing brood…
Meanwhile, you know what else is totally nonexistent? The lack of inappropriate ass-grabbing taking place on the red carpet at the Venice Film Festival.
PS. Nice tats, Angie! Extremely befitting of a Goodwill Ambassador to the UN.
[ICYDK]
Ben Widdicombe throws another brainteaser at us! And this time, we're not sure what to think.
Which Hollywood megastar couple likes to have the hotel where they stay in New York clip flattering pictures of them and their child from the celeb weeklies, to put in frames before they arrive at their suite?
Whoever it is must be super famous, totally desperate for attention and obsessed with keeping up their public image of a close-knit nuclear family and showing off their only biological artificially inseminated child. But who could it be??
How is mudslinger Ed Klein able to rationalize writing "such salacious details" about Katie Couric knowing she's a single mother of two daughters? "Those kids have been reading about their mother for the last 2, 3 years, explains Klein. "I'm only saying what they already know."
Yes, because everyone knows unsubstantiated gossip is totally justifiable when it's 2-3 years old!*
Meanwhile, bonus points to Klein for admitting that his entire bio consists of nothing more than tawdry rumors that have been previously reported and, presumably, disproved. Sounds like real groundbreaking stuff!
* Also, three years ago daughter Caroline was only 8! But apparently it's never too early to start reading recycled rumors about your mother's supposed promiscuity.
After a short 11-month gestation period, Tom Brady's ex-girlfriend Bridget Moynahan finally gives birth to a beautiful (out-of-wedlock) baby boy. No word on the official name yet, but we hear Moynahan's rejected the early favorite, "Bastard," and is said to be torn between the more direct "Alimony For Life," and the appropriately understated "Cha-ching!!"
[P6]
It seems like every week there's another new trend in Hollywood, doesn't it? From Lindsay Lohan's side-boob to Nicole Richie's oversized sunglasses to Pete Wentz's still-to-catch-on "guyliner," you never know which styles are going to catch on and become "the next big thing." Fortunately, we're here to offer you our inexpert opinion on what's hot…and what's not.
And what's hot right now? Celebrity baby pictures. And not just any pictures, mind you. We're talking "frolicking in the water with my child while the overworked, underpaid nanny takes a two minute bathroom break" pictures.
• Paula Abdul to write a self-help book for teens. Publishing insiders expect the result to be "straight-up crappy."
• Celebrities continue to disappoint with boring, unimaginative baby names.
• Beyonce shows off the best bikini bod that money—and an appointment with Dr. 90210—can buy.
• 50's housewife Katie "Thunderthighs" Holmes hits the beach with her suddenly ubiquitous daughter, Suri.
• David Beckham celebrates Real Madrid's league championship by spending the evening with his wife's breast implants.
Well, it's finally happened. Yesterday, Britney Spears and ex-hubby Kevin Federline put aside their differences long enough to sign a settlement agreement. Which, given her recent rehab-hopping and umbrella-wielding antics and his solid history of douchebaggery, is actually rather impressive. But how did it all go down?
"The parties signed a global settlement on all issues of their marriage and the custody of the children," Michael Sands, a spokesman for Federline's attorney Mark Vincent Kaplan, tells PEOPLE.
The deal was worked out in five-hour meeting in the Los Angeles high-rise offices of Spears's attorney. At the table were Spears and Federline, along with Spears's lawyer Laura Wasser and Federline's counsel Kaplan and Jim Simon.
Unfortunately, the terms of the agreement are still largely unknown, which leaves us to recklessly speculate based on a complete lack of evidence, hearsay or even persuasive argument. Our predictions? The Queen of Rehab scores custody of Jayden James and Sean Preston and—in exchange—K-Fed will be granted custody of a large portion of Britney's bank account.
Already over celebrity adoption? So are we. Seriously, when did carrying to term become so passe? Most of these actresses have two perfectly good ovaries, and yet it seems as though everyone's following Brangelina's lead and ordering in Vietnamese whenever they get the baby bug.
Anyhow thanks to Angie and her third-world brood, we're feeling overwhelmed by stories of celebs venturing to the farthest regions of the world only to return with children who may or may still belong to someone else. (We're talking about you, Madge!) And apparently we're not alone. George Clooney weighs in with his thoughts on this latest Hollwood craze:
[George Clooney] joked that he was going to adopt — but not quite like some of his Hollywood colleagues. He quipped, “I’m going to adopt a good-looking 24-year-old girl with some cash.”
We're right with you, Georgie! And in that spirit, we're currently taking offers from all ridiculously attractive twenty-somethings in need of a little TLC.
Congratulations to Salma Hayek!
Her rep has confirmed to Star magazine that Salma is pregnant., and that "she and her fiance, businessman Francois-Henri Pinault, are expecting their first child."
Which is so much more interesting than those "pregnancy or person-who-ingests-actual-food" photos we're generally subjected to. In any event, the Hayek confirmation proves an interesting twist in this recent celebrity pregnancy epidemic.
Let's take a look at the official scoreboard!
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Breaking:
Patrick Dempsey and his wife, Jill gave birth to two healthy twin boys in Los Angeles yesterday afternoon.
The boys, Sullivan Patrick and Darby Galen, are "already thrilled" to hear that their names are only semi-pretentious (at least by celebrity standards), and are already looking forward to their McTerrible Two's, to be immediately followed by a life of tabloid exploitation.
Demspey, "Dr. McDreamy" on Grey's Anatomy, is not currently expected to "pull a Diddy" and leave his wife's bedside in favor of party-hopping with the pantsless star of Factory Girl.
A rep for the Dempsey's said "the family is resting comfortably, and they're excited."
We just hope McDreamy is as good at changing those McDiapers (last time, we promise) as he is at eye-humping Meredith in the Seattle Grace elevator that no one else ever seems to ride.
Editorial Director
