After the jump, Correspodent Wendy rounds up the best cable comments of the last few days. CONTINUED »
Correspondent Wendy prove again that Cable TV is just a bunch of sound bites. CONTINUED »
Correspondent Wendy's quotes from cable news make us happy we don't watch cable news.
How does Correspodent Wendy feel about this installment of Cable Quotables? One word: disturbing. CONTINUED »
Correspondent Wendy always assumes cable host are on drugs. Can't they just be stupid? We think they're just stupid. CONTINUED »
This week Correspondent Wendy proves that Larry King talking about the news is an eloquent man compared with Larry King talking to Snoop Dogg. CONTINUED »
Disturbing nude images vampires, and male grooming habits from Correspondent Wendy, all after the jump. CONTINUED »
Correspondent Wendy is back and freaked out about she found this week.
Even though people who watch cable news seem smart from a distance, cable news is actually quite inane, as Correspondent Wendy proves again. CONTINUED »
Correspondent Wendy said the pickings were slim this week, but we disagree. Marvin Kitman called Bill O'Reily a Thanksgiving float and Anderson Cooper spoke to the harsh reality of the expiration dates of cute polar bears. CONTINUED »
Correspondent Wendy has never been happier. Why? Nancy Grace is back, and just as crazy as ever. CONTINUED »
This week's theme from Correspondent Wendy: Ickiness. Glenn Beck's butt, K-Fed's "magic wand," and Keith Olbermann's code word for intimate moments. It's enough to make one correspondent hurl. CONTINUED »
In this week's Cable Quotables, Kathy Griffin courts Anderson Cooper like a fifth grade fag-hag would. The two were too snarky for correspondent Wendy, who anticipates Nancy Grace's return from maternity leave next week.
We've never even met Correspondent Wendy, but we already have so much in common. For one, figuring out what to write about this week was harder than feigning interest in Anderson Cooper's Sesame Street cameo.
Today, Correspondent Wendy taught us that we have something with Bernie Grimm: an overwhelming sense of our purposeless in life. Hey, the holidays are all about existential crises. CONTINUED »
This week, we learn that talk shows hosts don't know how to Christmas shop, are misguided about Ann Coulter's psyche and think cats need wigs. The holiday's spirit has gotten to everyone's head. CONTINUED »
Look, here are the facts: If you drink the wrong soda, you’ll go to hell. Tucker Carlson is only reporting the news here, folks. Another fact to report: Michael Musto is kind of crazy. CONTINUED »
Sometimes Wendy is feeling whimsical. And when that happens, we generally go with it, lest she become angry about having to watch all those crappy cable shows in the first place! Today, Wendy writes, "I was thinking…what's the best way to save Tucker Carlson's show? Screw the bow ties: bring back Willie Geist!" (No bow ties? Surely Wendy's gone mad! But as it turns out, she has her reasons).
"Although Tucker's "Willie 2.0" replacement and part-time VP Bill Wolff is okay, nothing beats seeing Tucker and Willie riffing off each other. Besides, Willie could totally do it…sleep is highly overrated, anyway." And we totally agree! At least, we think we do. What was that part at the end? We may have inadvertently drifted off for a moment…
Like codebreakers attempting to find logical patterns out of the random jumble of numbers and symbols, Correspondent Wendy struggles to find a common thread in this week's Cable Quotables. Unfortunately, that's sometimes easier said than done. "This is one of those weeks where it's hard to find a 'theme,'" writes Wendy. "Does the fact that they're all nuts count?" For our purposes? Absolutely.
• "He did everybody a solid and he skipped the party, and went off into the woods to unload a few rounds into Blitzen." Christian Finnegan, explaining why Dick Cheney skipped the White House Christmas party, Countdown, December 5
"I didn't need to know that Joe Scarborough causes rashes," writes Correspondent Wendy. "Or that Alan Colmes has some sick Santa fantasy going on and Keith Olbermann's privates should stay that way." Needless to say, today's theme? Too much information. And, as Wendy puts it, "If I don't need a lifetime of therapy after putting this together, it'll be a miracle."
• "I don’t know a damned thing about this, and I’m glad." Joe Scarborough, proving ignorance is bliss (or at least hefty a paycheck!) Morning Joe, November 29
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