Um…sorry? After sharing with readers (and Kate White) that two of Cosmopolitan's selections for its 50 Hottest Bachelors had posed naked for online porn sites, the editor-in-chief summarily revoked their invitations to Tuesday's party in New York City, which they were going to be flown in for.
From the Dept. of Not Terribly Surprising (and the Dept. of NSFW), at least two of Kate White's selections for Cosmopolitan's Hottest Bachelors have posed nekkid for Internet websites. Derek Hawkes of Maine appeared (solo) on gay porn site SeanCody.com, while West Virginia's Daniel Kirk undressed for Playgirl.com.
It turns out Marie Claire's Joanna Coles isn't the only Hearst-y who's pulling double duty pushing real estate. Last month we followed the bizarre set of puzzle pieces that went like so: Coles put Tina Fey on the cover of Marie Claire to promote the actress' movie Baby Mama; the movie filmed outside 210 Riverside Drive, where Coles lives; an apartment listing for 210 Riverside mentions that Baby Mama filmed there; the listing is posted by Coles' own real estate agent (Hearst spokeswoman Jessica Pollack says "Joanna has no relationship and has never used Victoria Matus as her broker.").
And now a few other recognizable faces at Hearst are jumping on the trend, whether they volunteered to or not. CONTINUED »
To promote its August issue, Cosmopolitan is taking a page from its Australian version's book of stunts. Planning to beat the world record for, um, most women in bikinis gathered together(?), the mag is assembling some 1,200 lovely ladies at Miami's Nikki Beach to spell out "Cosmo." It'll end up as a four-page spread — and an excuse to cash multi-million dollar cheques from sponsors Nivea and Old Navy.
Yes, but will you be able to see it from space?
Cosmopolitan editor Kate White (or her wrangling minions) deserves an enormous amount of credit for last night bringing together John Mayer, Dane Cook, and Tony Romo — two former and one current love interest of Jessica Simpson. For its "Fun Fearless Male of the Year" awards (which Mayer won), Cosmo smartly scooped up all three celebs for some red carpet mingling, though White denies Simpson had anything to do with the choices.
Uh huh: Last year, Simpson's ex-husband Nick Lachey took home the award.
• We've been listening to the Hot Chip song, "Ready For The Floor" on all day repeat. The video is pretty cool, too.
• In the reality TV equivalent of George Clooney rejoining the cast of ER, which never happened, Lo is going to be a featured player on The Hills next season, not just "Lauren's Friend." You mean LC's BFF from Laguna Beach? Yes, we're familiar with Lo.
• Our gay li'l brother Queerty got a redesign today. The gays always age better than the straights. Also, a lesbian endorses Hillary Clinton. Too bad no one cares about that minority this election cycle. CONTINUED »
If you're anything like us, you probably figured that raging hormones are primarily confined to the genus of adolescent males, particularly those of the pimply-faced, squeaky voiced, and giant notebook-carrying variety.
In truth, however, you'll be somewhat alarmed to hear that most boys never grow out of their infatuation with sex. If, for instance, you happen to work in a building with great glass elevators and see-through ceilings, your male colleagues are, most likely, craning their necks every morning to maximize their viewpoint of your inappropriately short mini-dress, all based on the faint (if remote) possibility that they'll score the ultimate prize: a momentary glimpse of your exposed crotch-area.
Which means that all you poofy skirt-wearing types over at Hearst had better take note. Because you have, in all likelihood, already flashed your boss, his assistant and the janitor. Not to mention a rotating gaggle of onlookers.
Canadian people—they're so hopelessly awkward, aren't they? What with their funny, high-pitched voices, their public healthcare system and their inexplicable obsession with all things Mike Meyers! Fortunately, those promiscuous sexually experienced types over at Cosmopolitan are bringing their television program (think Sex and the City, but sluttier) to our neighbors to the north, as part of a new initiative geared towards helping Canucks get laid, entitled "Hey Canada—Go Fuck Yourselves."
Hearst and Canada's Corus Entertainment are partnering to bring Cosmopolitan Television to Canada. Launched in Spain in 2000, the TV version of the world's leading magazine for young women now exists in more than 20 countries, including Mexico and Argentina.
The Canadian version of the Cosmo TV Channel is said to include various hard-hitting segments, including "Why Tonsil Hockey Beats Regular Hockey: The Art Of French-Canadian Kissing," "How To Ask A Guy Oot" and "He's Just Not That Into You, Eh?"
Ladies! Are you single, desperate and hankering for a one night stand? If so, let post-feminist feminist Julia Allison tell you how to land a man (or at least how to straddle him and demand that he buy you overpriced shoes in exchange for sexual relations) in her article in this month's Cosmo, entitled "Max Out Your Sex Appeal" in just 13 easy steps.
A few of her best tips:
"When you get bored with your usual date-night jeans and sexy shirt," advises Julia, "go all Ivanka Trump—a classic black suit with only a lace bra underneath and red heels. If you've got it…yow."
And if you don't? Who cares, at least he'll know you're easy!
• Saturday, Donny, is Shabbos, the Jewish day of rest. That means that I don't work, I don't get in a car, I don't fucking ride in a car, I don't pick up the phone, I don't turn on the oven, and I sure as shit don't fucking go and and buy Harry Potterl! Shomer shabbos!
• After a somewhat disappointing debut, Portfolio's hotly anticipated second issue will sport what some are calling "a redesign," and what a spokeswoman is calling "tinkering."
• Most people would be embarrassed to admit they actually work for Cosmo. But not this guy!
• Kimora Lee Simmons wastes no time making sure viewers of her new reality show, Kimora: Life in the Fab Lane, clearly understand that she's a washed-up closet case with an over-inflated ego. "I've had billboards; that's my life," she says, matter-of-factly.
• Oprah becomes the newest Obama girl, raising money for the presidential wannabe because, as she explains, "I like my men like I like my coffee."
• Dave Zinczenko and Kate White swap spit in Men's Health and Cosmopolitan, leading to all sorts of fun body image issues.
• NYT's new newsroom violates Jeff Jarvis' prophecy. (The company's tech support and payroll will still be handled in Norfolk.)
• Why won't anyone pay attention to the nasty legal wrangling going on at Dealbreaker.com?
• Atoosa Rubenstein: Still a media darling.
• Lorne Michaels is the last to know what NBC is doing with his SNL.
• Who cares about ratings with those blue eyes of his? Not CNN, who's said to be re-upping him for $50m over 5 years.
CONTINUED »
• Kiera Knightley sues tabs for alleging she has an eating disorder; Rachel Zoe tells her "get over yourself, fatty!"
• Aww, Nick Lachey had a nerdy high-school crush on Carmen Electra.
• Heath Ledger and Michelle Williams might be secretly married! This would all be so scandalous and tawdry if they didn't already live together in BK with their lovechild.
• Creepy, 60-year-old Sylvester Stallone deprived the female population of his man-juice while filming the Rocky sequel nobody wanted.
• Denis Leary credits Cosmopolitan for his sexual prowess; we credit Denis Leary for the mental picture that made us lose our breakfast.
• Sienna Miller keeps party-hopping with her new BFF, P. Diddy Combs. Diddy, a daddy, says he's been doing an excellent job of keeping his eye on "the twins."
• A Cosmopolitan cover photographer gets a MoMa exhibition his honor. True talent is never appreciated until the artist is dead. [NYT]
• Nicole Richie has a real MySpace blog, uses that blog to tell people she is not anorexic. Photos of her looking skeletal are just a bonus. [Us]
• Jessica Simpson is really depressed. Probably because her hairdressing is running around telling people she shit her pants. [Page Six]
• Despite the fact that Martin Scorsese axed Jack Nicholson's strap-on suggestion, the appendage still makes a surprising appearance in the movie. Nicholson also will not be starting a dildo line. Sorry. [Lowdown]
• Fortune magazine snags a few New York Times staffers. Adam Moss just called BusinessWeek to give them another suggestion. [WWD, NYO]
Helen Gurley Brown spent 32 years towing the line between makeup tips and sex advice at Cosmopolitan, which meant she had more advice to offer than she could squeeze into Sex and The Single Girl. For instance, did you know there are eight rules for having an affair?
I believe most girls are attainable by somebody. Really, most girls, but you have to work at it. I think the reason you don't always succeed is that you want everything now, this minute, tonight's the night. Rule one is "Take time to court her." Rule two: "Love her out of bed." Laught at her jokes. Women have fantastic egos too, you know. Even pretty little flips of girls just love to be thought fascinating and funny. [...]
Rule seven: "Act confident, even if you aren't." If she thinks you know what you're doing, even if she doesn't know what she's doing, it helps. One man I know, when he's sure conditions are right, takes over like a father. He just tells the girl, "Now, let's get out of this dress, darling. Let me take your shoes." Well, pretty sure she's doing everything he says.
Set to press clippings of Christie Brinkley and Peter Cook's extramarital scandal, Gurley Brown's wise words have taken on a whole new meaning. Magazine editors, you see, will say anything to cheerlead scandal.
Since we don't work for one of Cosmo's ad agencies, we're forced to buy our way into their Media Man of the Year Contest. Thanks to these big spenders for getting us into Kate White's fantasy.
• Sidekick 3
• Verizon
• VH1
• HBO
• Little Miss Sunshine
Perhaps with your ad dollars, we can buy a quarter page in Cosmo next year and qualify.
Well, color us embarrassed. How were we to know that Cosmopolitan's "Media Men" contest was only open to actual employees of Cosmo? It's not like we actually logged on to nominate somebody. Unlike (ahem) Dylan Stableford who may or may not have been nominating himself … or Greg Lindsay … when he discovered these "official rules."
To Enter: Starting June 26, 2006 visit www.cosmomediamen.com, fill out the online entry form and submit a digital photograph of your favorite media man (could be yourself) by July 20, 2006. Nominees must be employees of recognized advertising agencies working with Cosmopolitan Magazine. Or, if you don't have a photo, your Cosmo rep will stop by and take his/your picture (Cosmo reps can take photos of potential entrants only if the potential entrants reside in the same city.)
Sorry to crush your dreams of Warren St. John or Jeff Bercovici whisking you off to Desert Springs, but it looks like this is a contest for Cosmo 's advertisers (aka sugar daddies) only. Makes sense though … so many more hotties in advertising than in journalism.
Cosmo's Search For Media Men Excludes Writers, Editors — And Just About Everybody Else [Fishbowl, NY]
Earlier: Radar Looks Good on Jeff Bercovici
Earlier: Maybe Warren St. John Will Bring You to Cali With Him
Kate White's book How To Set His Thighs On Fire: 86 Lessons on Love, Life, Men, and (Especially) SEX is sitting on our desk. It's been there for about three weeks now. Well, actually we popped it in our bag one day to peruse during an especially busy day of commuting and forgot about it, so only last night during some housecleaning did we find it again. And how timely, given today's item in amNY, wherein the Cosmopolitan editor professes the book was "accidental."
"One day I was talking to my publisher," White explains, "and she said, 'Do you like your job, Kate?'" (This seems to me a silly question, as anyone who has ever talked with White knows that she's deliriously in love with her job.)
So of course White answered, "More than you can imagine–it has been the most delicious, fabulous experience of my life." She then 'jokingly' added, "Someday I want to write a book on How to Set His Thighs on Fire about everything I learned!"
Apparently that's all her publisher needed to hear–the next day she sent a contract over to White's literary agent. "My agent called me and said 'I have a contract for a book I've never even heard of!' And I said, 'maybe it's a mistake!' and she read the title and I said 'oh my God.'"
And naming naming Chapter Four "15 Ways to Tap Your Inner Sex Kitten," Chapter 17 "How to Look as Sexy as J. Lo," and Chaper 62 "The Most Neglected Moan Zone on a Man's Body"? For Kate's sake, we'll let her use the excuse of happenstance. But kudos to her for turning an average 2000-word listicle into 250 pages of third-grade reading level.
Sex! Tips! from Cosmo [Julia Allison, amNY]
Hearst's new 46-story building, complete with its steel tower, is up and running. Expect the "Hearsties" to be on the move starting May 4.
Oh, and make sure to change your boss' Rolodex, while simultaneously noting where to send your resume (unless you're sending it to HR … we think they're still in another building). Hearst is now at 300 W. 57th Street, from their former digs at 959 Eighth Ave.
The great view of Central Park trumped any post 9/11 fears, with Cathy Black getting a prime view from her new 43rd floor suite. But the real news? Kate White, editor in chief of Cosmopolitan, has sex tipped her way the top editorial floor.
Cosmopolitan, the most profitable magazine in the empire, has the highest floor for an individual magazine, the 38th. Oprah Winfrey, whose O magazine is the second most profitable in the company behind Cosmo, will be on the 36th.
That's right Oprah, you're in New York now. And since you don't work out at RADU or sit shoulder to shoulder with David Zinczenko on the Today show every other day, you don't any special favors here.
HEARST BIGWIGS LAY CLAIM TO THEIR DREAM ADDRESS [Keith J. Kelly, New York Post]
• While we thought Dave Chappelle was having a mental breakdown, it turns out that all he wanted to do was to trash white people a little more than usual. But damn those caucasian bosses, they wouldn't have any of it. [AP]
• Nerve goes to the gossip columnists for sex advice and, somehow, we were included. [Nerve]
• Kate White spends 10 hours a month perfecting the craft of the perfect Cosmopolitan cover line. With two million newsstand sales, it's 10 hours well spent. [Forbes]
• More Paid $ix fallout: News Corp. is denying, on Richard Johnson's behalf, deceased landlord-slash-media powerplayer Lou Rudin ever gave the Page Six editor a rent-controlled Upper West Side flat, though former NYTer Blake Fleetwood stands by the story. [Daily Politics]
• Meanwhile, Jared Paul Stern will answer Gawker's questions, but not ours. It's nice to know he's still got kind words for Page Six, the institution. [Gawker]
• Egads! Sometimes the Washington Post news desk and editorial board don't match up. [Washington City Paper]
• Meanwhile, President Bush wants WaPo to apologize for its "reckless reporting" regarding White House intelligence. [E&P]
• Leaks don't only come from the White House; they arrive from the taping of Will & Grace's series finale, too. (Spoiler warning.) [MNH]
We were as shocked to see a review of Bonnie Fuller's book in the New York Times as Alexandra Jacobs was when she heard Bon would be editing Glamour.
Apparently, our complete coverage of The Joys of Much Too Much. Go for the Big Life — the Great Career, the Perfect Guy, and Everything Else You've Ever Wanted (Even if You're Afraid You Don't Have What It Takes) wasn't enough to fill the hearts of aspiring tabloid editors everywhere.
So, what does the Times think?
But the new book by this widely reviled Manhattan media figure — so tough a boss that disgruntled former employees found solace in an "I Survived Bonnie" Yahoo Internet message group — makes a surprisingly potent statement for the sisterhood.
As it turns out, while Fuller, now editorial director at American Media, was raising the libido of Cosmo, Marie Claire and Us Weekly, a new and bloodless breed of women's magazines was coming into being, exemplified by the folksy yet upscale Time Inc. title Real Simple, which sells women products purporting to streamline their busy lives.
They figured they would sort of sidestep the tampons, thongs, razors, and purses, and go straight to the dirt: Bonnie Fuller uses her new book to trash the editors of Real Simple.
See, once the Times gets started, even the librarians can't escape the wrath of gossip mongering.
That (Other) Cosmo Girl [Alexandra Jacobs, New York Times]
Editorial Director
