On The View today, Barbara Walters gives America one more reason to boycott country music by awkwardly telling Faith Hill, "We'd all like to 'do' your husband." [HuffPo]
• Faith Hill tells a grabby Tim McGraw fan to "show some respect," keep her hands to herself and refrain from any activity that involves balls flying at her face. In response, an omnipresent Stacy Dash quipped, "Well, there goes your social life."
• "WHICH actress' weight gain is being blamed on her scoundrel ex-boyfriend who knocked her up? She only started shedding some of the weight when he forced her to terminate her pregnancy." Aw, they called Jessica Simpson an "actress."
• We fully believed that Heidi Klum was modeling the chicest, most outrageous in cutting-edge couture until a small child laid eyes on her and said, "But she has nothing on!"
• Joe Pesci to marry Sly Stallone's ex.
• OMG, Paris Hilton was disinherited by her grandfather, reports a myriad of unreliable websites.
• Kelly Osbourne drops thirty pounds by eating healthy, exercising regularly going heavy on the Photoshop.
• Faith Hill and Tim McGraw's home is burglarized! No official word on the precise number of cowboy hats, snakeskin boots or tins of Skoal chewing tobacco are missing.
• Judith Regan gets advice from a sex-toy expert on her Sirius radio show; listeners (and Jossip editors) silently "throw up a little" in their mouths.
• Barbi twins tried, failed, to save Anna Nicole Smith by leaving her an impassioned unanswered voicemail.
• Meanwhile, the National Enquirer reports that—in addition to starving herself—Anna Nicole Smith was intentionally underfeeding baby Dannielynn so she's look "slim and sexy."
• Brandy celebrated her 28th birthday by blowing out the candles and wishing this whole vehicular manslaughter thing goes away faster than Ray J's sex tape.
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• Lindsay Lohan finds herself involved in another paparazzi car crash, but at least she's picking new locations. And outfits.
• Faith Hill's manager plays damage control following the singer's on-camera freak out when Carrie Underwood took home the Female Vocalist award.
• Tinsley Mortimer & Co. face off for a chance to star in a new series about the lives they lead in real life.
• Britney Spears is not as dumb as her David Letterman appearances portray her to be: She filed for divorce just in time to keep a clause in her prenup from giving Kevin Federline more cash.
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