• Is Leslie Sloan crazy? We wish somebody would offer to take Britney Spears off our hands. [Lowdown]

• Meanwhile, Brit struggles to finds someone to take over her pesky New York apartment. [NYO]

• We pity the fool who decides to take advice from Mr. T. [MSNBC]

• Thank god we don't have to pretend to be good citizens by watching Geena Davis on TV anymore. [CNN]

• Teri Hatcher should consider her hot minute with Ryan Seacrest a blessing — Oprah talks always help book sales. [Us]

• Paula Abdul stopped her drunken crying to have a truly delusional moment. She announced that Simon Cowell wants to marry her. [MSNBC]

• Brian Farnham joins Time Out New York as EIC. Dan Peres is totally jealous. [WWD]

• Bertelsmann, a German company, is looking to create a MySpace type site for an older, lonelier crowd. Don't they know that all the old lonely people already stalk underage teens on MySpace? [Cnet]

• Jack Shafer reveals his thoughts on media bias: it sells big time. And he completely duped us into reading his long involved column while he was at it. [Slate]

• New York Women in Communications Inc. honored "eight ladies of renown" with its Matrix awards yesterday. The only place where Jill Abramson, Candace Bushnell and Geena Davis can receive the same level or recognition — except when it comes to their outfits. [Fishbowl NY]

• Michael Wolff's latest political rant pretty much rips Press Secretary Scott McClellan a new one. Again, we try not to agree with Wolff, but we just always happen to hate the same people. [VF]