• Random British exhibitionist Gemma Atkinson's steals Britney's coveted neckbrace look

• Before she was sentenced to 45 days in prison, Paris Hilton was appreciating life's simple pleasures. Like eating corn on the cob with a total stranger.

• Not even Jennifer Boobs Love Hewitt looks hot just moments after stepping off the plane.

• Jumpin' Joe Francis to possibly rejoin his prison boyfriend only moments after saying goodbye.

• Sting and his wife reportedly fired their personal chef…for getting knocked up. The creator of tantra would never approve!

• This is what you get when you go to the “World’s Most Popular Hotel” in New York: a yellow-stained tub and footprints on the wall. [NYO]

• This city has more celeb marriage scandals than an issue of Star. Except in New York, the celebs are B-List and the mistresses are always under 20-years-old. [NYP]

• Joe Lieberman will not rest until he loses every single race imaginable. [NYT]

• And just when you thought issues in Park Slope couldn't get any more petty or trivial. [Daily Slope]