Someone needs to keep an eye on Jennifer Aniston, because rumor has it John Mayer dumped her and, if the media is to be believed, she is going to have a nervous breakdown due to the grief. Or something.
We've come to the conclusion that Dane Cook is a genius, because one simple MySpace (yes, we're still trolling that site this afternoon) rant has gotten more people talking about his upcoming movie than should be allowed.
Apparently Dane has an issue with the movie's poster and has decided to point out every little thing that's wrong with it ("My left side looks like Brittany Spears' vagina"), much like a teenage girl who feels the urge to criticize every acceptable picture of herself in a quest for gratification.
People magazine named Kate Hudson it's Most Beautiful Person in its annual "100 Most Beautiful" issue. Then again, Rumer Willis was also included on the list, so you can imagine how much authority this thing carries. [People]
Even though Owen Wilson is re-romancing Kate Hudson, the blitz of publicity from the tabloids didn't help his film career any. Comedy Drillbit Taylor took in only $10 million over the weekend. By ways of comparison, a single set of photos of the blonde couple holding hands swept up $100,000, or 1 percent of the movie's opening gross.
Even after spending $6 million for Jennifer Lopez's new twins, People magazine couldn't resist also being the magazine that scored those first pics of Owen Wilson and Kate Hudson holding hands. (Smart move keeping Marc Anthony off the cover though!) Us Weekly is said to have dropped out of the bidding for the photos, proving too costly at around $100,000, and was instead forced to go with (yet another) Lauren Conrad cover.
Since none of the celebrity tabloids that hit newsstands today have the $100,000 photos of Kate Hudson and Owen Wilson holding hands, we can only assume People magazine was the highest bidder. We'll know tomorrow.
In the latest round of overpriced celebrity photos, we're hearing Splash News' exclusive pictures of Kate Hudson holding hands with Owen Wilson in Miami are commanding a whopping six-figure sum.
The photos, caption writers will lead you to believe, are the first evidence the twosome have resumed their romance since A) he tried killing himself; and B) rumors surfaced that they began dating again. And those caption writers would be correct!
One source suggests only Us Weekly and People have the budgets to remain in the bidding war against each other, where the price of the pics is expected to go for over $100,000.
The photos will also provide the winning tabloid with a nice sidebar: It's been reported Owen Wilson had been romancing Marley & Me co-star Jennifer Aniston, which, of course, is now totally false because he's totally in love with his old blonde flame and would never risk his mental stability to date two A-listers at once.
• Rachel Bilson can finally join the Facebook group, She Bangs, She Bangs.*
• Kate Hudson and Owen Wilson back together? Awkward …
• Amy Winehouse needs to get back to rehab if she thinks a make-up line is a smart business venture.
• J. Lo lets her babies know she loves them through purchased goods.
• Hugh Jackman is a jacked man.
*Not a real Facebook group.
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RUMOR OF THE DAY Kate Hudson is carrying Justin Timberlake's Sexy Baby. “What about Jessica Biel?” “Was Us Weekly hiding this from me?” you might ask. Well it’s all gossip, but allegedly they’ve been shagging for a year. It's been on the L because Kate Hudson doesn’t want to be responsible for any more awkward situations and or become the next Cameron Diaz. This can end in one of two ways: Kate Hudson will lose weight or she will have the most awkward People magazine spread ever. [Hollyscoop]
• Jennifer Lopez has set the birth of her twins for February 14. Cheesy, sure, but a total J. Lo move. What we do judge is planning her c-section on a Thursday, for the benefit of the tabs. If that's true, he deserves every forthcoming invasion of privacy.
• Kate Hudson and Liv Tyler threw a party at the Waverly Inn. Where did those ladies meet, a group for the famous children of famous parents?
• Paris Hilton is still into men with fading fame; she hooked up with Simon Rex last night.
• Playboy bunnies hit up Mardi Gras. Hopefully they know better than to give it up for a free t-shirt.
• Pictures of the bump that launched "My Humps"
• Pink Is The New Blog is better at keeping Project Runway related secrets than we are.
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• Kate Hudson has either gained weight or gained a fetus. Knowing all the recent pregnancy announcements in Hollywood, we hope it's weight. Knowing Hollywood, it's probably a fetus.
• Jewel is still alive and still attractive in a Alaskan way.
• Speaking of which, Sophia Loren is alive and still attractive in a cougar way.
• David Beckham visits Brazil, gets a new tattoo and supports his wife. And for the only thing you care about: He's still hot.
• As if there could ever be too much, here's more on Britney Spears being crazy.
• How gay is Top Gun? Pretty fucking gay.
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• On seeing this picture of his ex-fiancée and current GF Heidi Montag posed on all fours, Spencer Pratt thought to himself, "now this looks familiar."
• Trying to seem smart by taking a stand on the writers strike, Joaquin Phoenix ends up looking like a misguided first grader, and misspells his name.
• For our money, Brian Austin Green peaked during the later college years of 90210. Everything that came before and after was for not. CONTINUED »
• Nice abs, Fergie. And by nice abs Fergie, we mean nice airbrushing, Blender.
• We took a nap, and we totally missed Tara Reid's anorexia move. We saw it coming, though.
• Amy Winehouse is arrested for perverting the course of justice. We love it when British courts talk dirty.
• The children are always to blame: Kate Hudson claims when her son was born, she realized things would never work with Chris Robinson. We thought it had something to do with the weed, her raising career and his vanishing one.
• If not for Jessica Simpson, would anyone know that it's football season?
• Think everyone gets what they deserve? Think again! Unfit mother Britney Spears purportedly received "$30,000 in leather and fur coats, $10,000 worth of diamonds and $4,000 worth of sunglasses" all for making it to the tender age of 26.
• Even better? She spent the big 2-6 fighting to regain custody of her children partying with supposed nemesis Paris Hilton and drinking herself into oblivion.
• Meanwhile, Paris Hilton injects her lips with enough chemical Restylane to kill a small club promoter.
• Tired of getting the old once-over from the cross-eyed fellow at the corner deli? Just be glad you're not reduced to eating the high-cal, low-taste school sponsored delights that gave you lifelong gastrointestinal problems and the high school nickname of "Thicky."
• The oft-photographed actress Kate Hudson (seen here "spontaneously" laughing) has almost as much fun walking the red carpet as those giggly Neutrogena chicks do washing their faces.
• Ashlee Simpsons gives her personal eyebrow tweezer altogether way too much credit.
• Lindsay Lohan is supposedly broke. She's also supposedly sober, but we don't believe that one, either.
• Britney continues to spend way too much money on worthless crap at the local drugstore; paparazzi/media continue to spend way too much time over-thinking it.
• Diamonds are a girl's best friend. Either that or gigantic fake breasts.
• Kate Hudson discovers that Owen Wilson is a manic depressive with suicidal tendencies, nonetheless finds him to be a "better catch" than Dax Shepard.
Editorial Director
