• Former Superstar Molly Shannon is reduced to headlining the opening of a new public restroom.

• At family reunions, Britney Spears is generally known as "the functional one." Seriously.

• Most actors/actresses secretly want to be musicians. Unfortunately, the secret's pretty much out.

• Chris Judd (better known as JLo's short-lived second husband) has apologized tried to take credit for letting the cat out of the bag about Lopez's pregnancy. In actuality, the real culprit was JLo's rapidly growing uterus.

• Rihanna gets caught without her umbrella on the cover of Mexican FHM. Dios mio!